


Killi's Rugrat

by ImKChhilJ



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-09
Updated: 2016-01-11
Packaged: 2018-03-11 09:14:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 27,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3321989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImKChhilJ/pseuds/ImKChhilJ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>CaptainSwan AU - Killian and Emma are both kids in a foster home, but Killain gets adopted. Fate has them meeting again after 10 years, but Emma doesn't remember who he is. They are living their own lives, but will their worlds collide at any point?</p><p>Sorry for the bad summary, but please take a chance and read. This is my first ever fanfic. Not beta'd so all mistakes are my own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Good News

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone. This is my very 1st fanfic. I actually started writing this last summer, and got to about ch 9, but then I somehow lost everything from ch 5 onwards and I lost the motivation to re-write and continue. I was recently talking to a friend of mine and she convinced me that I should give it another shot and post it. So here it is.

Nine year old Killian hated that little girl. She always wanted to play with the boys, but she didn’t understand that she was just way too young to be playing with them. And besides, she was a 4-year old girl! Which boy wanted to play with Barbies or play dress-up with a 4 year old girl?!

“Killi, please play with me. I’ll love you forever,” Emma said as she jumped on Killian’s bed at the foster home. She gave him a big puppy dog face thinking that he’d fall for it, like everyone else did. But he knew better and plus he hated it when she called him “Killi”. So, Killian shoved Emma off his bed and kept reading his favourite book, Peter Pan.

“Get off you rugrat. I’m busy; I don’t have time for you.”

Emma landed on the floor with a big thud, and immediately started crying.

“Killian, that’s it! You are not going out to play today. You have homework to do, give me your book” Cathy exclaimed while running into the room and scooping Emma up. Cathy was the daughter of the foster care centre’s owner. But she always helped take care of the kids and helped with their homework. She was a wonderful girl in her early 20s, and the favourite of all the kids.

Killian was mad. He knew Emma was crying just to get him in trouble because he didn’t want to play with her. But just like always, he was the one who had to give up his book and pretend to do homework that he had already finished. He was so sick and tired of Emma always getting her way.

“Emma, I hate you. I hope you never get adopted and ruin another kid’s life!” Killian yelled at the crying girl.

“Killian, you don’t mean that. Apologise right now. You know Emma loves you like a brother, you know she looks up to you. You’re the only one who’s stayed constant in her 3 years since she came to this foster home. Hush Emma, he didn’t mean it. He loves you too. He’s just upset right now. No need to cry.” Cathy kept trying to calm Emma down, who had started crying even more, and took Emma back to her room.

Killian lay back onto his bed. He knew in his heart that he didn’t mean what he had said to Emma, but ever since she learned how to talk and walk, she was always following him and bothering him to play with her. Killian wished again for the millionth time in his 4 years of staying at the foster home that someone would adopt him, and that he could finally leave this place.

* * *

Killian didn’t see Emma for 2 days, which he was glad for because it meant she was doing her own thing and not bothering him. On this Monday morning, Killian was very late. All his friends already had their breakfast and had already gone to school so they could play before being forced to learn something. Killian was just grabbing his bag and heading to the kitchen when Cathy came into his room with a huge smile on her face.

“Killian you will never believe the news I have for you.”

“Let me guess, the little rugrat is finally gone from my life. That would be good news.”

“Oh Killian, you don’t mean that. But I guess in a way you are right. Although it’s not Emma that will be gone from your life, you will be gone from hers.”

Killian didn’t want to get his hopes up, especially after what happened the last time, but he couldn’t help asking. “Cathy, are you saying what I think you’re saying? Am I getting adopted?” he whispered soflty.

“Yes Killian, the Jones family has already signed the preliminary paperwork. If everything is a good fit after 3 months you legally become their child. You get to go home with them today.” Killian was stunned. The last time there was a chance of this happening, the family backed out at the last minute. He didn’t even realize Cathy was still talking to him; he was so lost in his thoughts. “They will be here at 12 to pick you up. So, no school for you today. We have to get you all packed up and ready to go. But that also means you won’t get a chance to say bye to any of your friends.”

“What?! I have to say bye. There’s Tommy and Jessie. Oh and I can’t forget about Billy. I have to say bye to them. I play with them every day. And they all already went to school. Maybe I can come back and visit them, eh Cathy? That would be ok right? You don’t mind do you?”

“Oh Killian honey, I would love it if you came back to visit. But I’m so sorry; I don’t think you’ll be able to see those boys again. The family that’s taking you, they live in Boston, and you know how far Boston is from here. I think you should write the boys some letters if you want to say goodbye. I think you should start packing ok. I’ll come help you in a little while, but think about what you want to take with you.” Cathy walked out of his room then and he just sat there.

_I’m finally leaving this place. 4 years and I get to go. I hope I like them. I wonder what they’re like._

He started going through his closet and drawers, trying to figure out what he wanted to take with him. But it’s not like he had a lot of stuff, so he just decided it made sense to take everything - all his clothes and all his books. He sat on his bed waiting for Cathy to come back in and thought about what he wanted to write to his friends. But the more Killian thought about it, the more he didn’t feel like writing anything to Tommy, Jessie of Billy. Sure they were always together, even were in the same class at school, but none of them had been staying at the foster care centre for more than a year. Billy had only just come 3 months ago, because his parents died in a car accident. So yes, they were all friends, but Killian didn’t think that he would actually miss the three boys. He was always good at making friends. All his other friends from the foster home had come and gone over his 4-year stay. This would be just like that.

 _But there is Emma. You’ll miss her._ Killian’s subconscious was telling him.

Yeah, he would definitely miss Emma. Even though she was a pain in his ass, she was his little rugrat. He always made sure she was safe, he always kept an eye out for her, made sure that none of the other kids made fun of her or bullied her, especially when she tried so hard to play with the boys and think she could do everything that they could. He did love her a lot, but he knew he couldn’t say bye to her. It wasn’t even the fact that she would come back from daycare _after_ he left, but more so, that he wouldn’t be able to handle looking into her cute, big green eyes and tell her that he was leaving her. Tell her that after 3 years of always being there for her, and making sure there were no monsters under her bed, that he would be gone from her life forever. Leaving her like her parents left her.

Killian started crying suddenly, and that was how Cathy found him when she came back to his room. “Oh Killian. It’ll be okay. You’ll make new friends. And the Jones family has 2 kids – a boy and a girl. Liam is 12 years old, and Ruby is 4. You won’t be alone.”

“It’s not that Cathy. I know I’ll make new friends. I’m not sad about leaving them, I’m sad about leaving Emma. She needs me. What will she do without me?”

“Emma will be fine honey. She’s a strong girl and we will all still be here for her. She’ll forget after a few years.”

Killian got up from the bed and started going through his little shoebox in which he kept his pictures and other little mementos he had collected over the years. He took out a small keychain with a swan on it and gave it to Cathy. “Can you give this to her for me please. She’s too young for me to write her a letter; she barely knows how to read yet. But I want the rugrat to have this.”

“Killian, that was your mother’s! Are you sure you want to give it away? It’s the only thing you have left of your parents." Killian’s parents had died in a house fire when he was 3, him only surviving because he was on a play date. There hadn’t been much left in the ruins of the fire, a couple of pictures which he kept in his shoebox and his mother’s keychain.

“I know Cathy. But I have mother’s and father’s pictures. Emma doesn’t even have that of me. I don’t want her to forget me. I want to give her this. Please give it to her, and tell her that I love her and I’ll never forget her and that she will always be Killi's Rugrat. Please Cathy.” Killian looked so earnest at that moment, the young women had no chance of refusing him. She told Killian that she would give the keychain to Emma and then told him that it was time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well here it is. I have until chapter 5 already written from last year, but I would love some feedback and hopefully it will motivate me to re-write and continue with this story. Again this is my first attempt at writing a full story, so please be kind. I would love to get some feedback. Thanks.
> 
> ~KCJ


	2. Goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who left Kudos and to Isabelle for my first comment!  
> Hope you enjoy this new chapter.

Killian went to say goodbye to the employees of the foster centre, most of whom had known him since he first came four years ago. They all hugged him and wished him the best in his life.

And then there they were - two lovely people, in their early 30s. Mr. Jones was nice and tall with big brown eyes, and who looked like he could hold the world on his shoulders, and Mrs. Jones was very pretty with long brown hair and hazel eyes. She looked like a very loving mother. Suddenly, for the first time in his life, Killian felt shy and didn’t know what to say. So he awkwardly stood there, with a big suitcase next to him, staring down at his feet. Mrs. Jones came forward and knelt down in front of him. “Hi Killian, my name is Lillian, and this here is Eric.”

“Hello, it’s a pleasure to meet you mam,” Killian finally said.

“Oh son, you don’t need to be formal with us. And go right ahead and call us by our first names. And then if you ever feel comfortable with it, we would love it if you called us mom and dad.” Eric said coming forward as well, grabbing Killian into a big bear hug.

Killian was stunned, no one was this nice. He was sure it was just so they would look good in front of the foster care centre, but he was sure that once they got in the car, Lillian and Eric would be really mean.

Killian didn’t say anything, just turned around, and gave one final wave to the people who had raised him the last 4 years. “Bye” he whispered and saw that Cathy had tears running down her cheeks.

“Oh Killian, I will miss you so” she said running up to him and grabbing him for one last hug. “Please be good, you always were my favourite. Now you go and have a good life and don’t worry about anyone here, especially not Emma.”

Cathy let Killian go, and he turned around to follow Lillian and Eric into the waiting car. Eric had already put his suitcase in the trunk and was sitting in the driver’s seat, but Lillian was waiting at the door to make sure that Killian got in all right. Killian got in the car, and buckled in and as the car left he couldn’t help but look out the back window, to the place that was basically his home since he was 4 years old.

* * *

An hour later, Emma came bouncing through the doors. “Cathy, Cathy, Cathy! Look what I made, I can’t wait to show Killi when he comes home from school. Look Cathy, it’s a picture of me and him. I want to go put it in his room right now.” The little girl was very excited as she ran through the house. All the employees gave her a pitying glance and kept going about their business, but Cathy ran after Emma, into Killian’s old room.

When Emma was in his room, she knew right away that something was wrong. All his books were gone, and his pictures. “Where is Killi Cathy? Where are all his things?”

“Emma. Honey. I’m so sorry. But Killian isn’t here anymore. He went to live with some very nice people. And he couldn’t say goodbye to you, even though he wanted to.”

“Killi left me? Killi left me? Why?” Emma started crying then, throwing herself onto Killian’s bed.

“Killian wants you to have this Emma, it was his mothers.” Cathy placed the swan keychain in Emma’s hand and stroked her back trying to calm her down. “He wants you to remember him always and be strong and be good in school. Killian said he loves you very much and he was very sad to leave you and that you’ll always be his little rugrat ok.” Cathy gave Emma the swan keychain and sat there continuing to comfort the little girl.

“No no no, Killi will come back for me. I love Killi, please Killi come back” Emma was sobbing and starting to become hysterical, but no matter how hard anyone tried, no one could get her to calm down and take her away from Killian’s bed. She clung to the keychain and sobbed herself to sleep on Killian’s old bed.

Little did she know, that as she lay there sobbing, Killian suddenly felt his heart breaking, and even though he decided that the Jones were actually very nice people and that Liam and Ruby were great, he just couldn’t explain the sudden pain and sadness he was overcome with. He lay his first night on a wonderful bed in Boston, thinking only of big green eyes and how he would never get to see them again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read and review! Thanks!  
> ~KCJ


	3. Blast From The Past

**10 years later**

19 year old Killian Jones was back in Boston. It was late April and he had just come back home from finishing his last exam of his first year at Rutgers University in New Brunswick, New Jersey. He couldn’t wait to see Liam or Ruby after 8 months; he didn’t get a chance to come home during Christmas, so the last he had seen his family, Ruby was getting ready to start high school. Liam had never left Boston, even deciding to go to Boston University, which he had finished the previous year and had spent the last year working at the docks and training to join the Navy.

Killian was really proud of his older brother and couldn’t wait to see him off for his big new adventures. They always had loved ships and dreamt of living on them. Maybe one day Killian would even join his brother in the Navy, but for now, he had plans to finish university, get his degree in engineering and keep playing for the Rutgers Scarlet Knights football team, which he got a full scholarship for.

He walked through the door of his house, dropped his bag on the floor and yelled. “Oi, anybody home? The favourite and most dashing Jones kid is back in town.” All he heard was a very high pitched squeak, and then he was on his ass, knocked over by a 100-pound girl.

“Killian, you’re home. I missed you so much. I have so much to tell you. Grade 9 was AMAZING! I’m on the cheerleading squad and you’ll never guess who asked me out. Graham, you know Graham right. You’re friends with his sister Mary Margaret. OMG, did you know that Mary Margaret and David are getting married. And Graham asked me to go to the wedding with him. It’ll be so much fun. I can’t wait for it. It’ll be amazing. And oh, you have to meet my best friend. She moved here at the beginning of the school year, remember I told you about her. You’ll love her. Her name is Emma.”

“Gees Ruby, get off and calm the hell down. I just got here, you don’t need to bombard me with 8 months of info in 2 minutes. Quit your rambling and let me get some food. And yes, obviously I know about the wedding – I am the best man, or did you forget that M&M and Dave are my closest friends?” He pushed her off his lap and headed for the kitchen.

But he was not expecting what he walked in on. Sitting at the table were 2 kids who couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Killian stopped so suddenly that Ruby walked right into him. “What’s wrong Killian, why’d you stop? Oh, gees Emma, Neal would you guys stop! I leave you alone for 5 minutes and you’re at it like rabbits.”

Ruby walked up to her 2 friends and hit them on their heads. Emma and Neal broke apart and had the decency to look slightly ashamed. “Emma, this is my brother, Killian. Killian this is Emma, she’s the girl I was telling you about before, the one who moved here before school started. And obviously you know who Neal is right?”

“Hi! Nice to meet you. Ruby talks about you all the time. I always wondered if I would ever meet you. I thought she was making you up because you’ve never been around. But I guess you’re real.” Emma got up from her seat and stuck her hand out for Killian to shake. But all Killian could do was stare. He had never expected her to become so beautiful or have so much confidence in herself. But here she was, 10 years later, big green eyes staring up at him, blonde waves framing her angelic face, slowly getting more and more confused as she waited for a response.

“Killian, stop staring. It’s weird.” Ruby elbowed him in the side, and he shook his head to clear it. He finally smiled at Emma and shook her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze before letting go again. He glanced down at her neck and saw his swan keychain on a silver chain around her neck. She had kept it all this time. He couldn’t help himself from grinning widely.

“Hi Emma. Nice to meet you too. That’s a great necklace you have there.”

“Thanks, I’ve had it for a really long time. It was a gift. It’s the only thing I have left.” Emma became very still and looked down at the floor as she whispered her answer to Killian. It didn’t seem to Killian that Emma remembered who he was, there was no hint of recognition in those beautiful eyes, just sadness. Killian couldn’t take his eyes off of Emma and was lost in thought; wondering how her life had been, if she had finally been adopted and how she ended up in Boston, friends with his little adoptive sister.

“Yo Killian, great to see you again. I made the football team. 2nd string QB. Trying to follow in your amazing footsteps.” Neal interrupted Killian from his thoughts, making him jerk his head towards Neal.

“That’s great Neal, I’m sure you’ll be 1st string soon enough. After all, you did practice with the best QB Storybrooke High has ever seen. I did manage to get the team out of their losing streak and win 3 consecutive titles.” Killian was back to being the smooth QB that the district of Storybrooke knew and loved so well. He earned a big eye roll from Ruby and a look of respect from Neal, but from Emma, all he got was a look of annoyance.

Grabbing a bottle of juice from the fridge, Killian headed up to his room, after glancing back at Emma one more time.

_Emma. She’s here. She’s all grown up. But she doesn’t know who I am. Should I tell her? What’s the point? I left her alone there. What has her life been like?_

“Killian what’s going on?” Killian was so lost in thought, he hadn’t realized that Ruby had followed him to his room and was staring at him. “You didn’t even eat anything, and as soon as you got home you told me you wanted food. Something is bothering you. So tell me.”

“When did you become so wise and astute Ruby?” Killian tried changing the subject, not wanting to answer her. But the look she was giving him and the stance she held was exactly like their mother. A look Ruby knew Killian could never challenge, and so with a long sigh he started speaking.

“I know her. Emma I mean. We were at the same foster centre before I became a Jones. I left her there all alone. I gave her that swan necklace, though it was a keychain when I gave it to her. It’s my birth mom’s keychain. I gave it to Emma so she would remember me and know that I loved her. But I guess she has no idea at all who I am.” He finished, looking very defeated and so unlike himself.

“Oh Killi, I’m so sorry. Why don’t you tell her? She was only 4 when you left right. Maybe if you tell her she’ll remember you.”

“No Ruby, I don’t want to tell her. She seems happy now; she must have had a good life after I left.”

“You’re wrong Killian. Emma didn’t have a good life. She went from foster home to foster home until last year. She only stayed at each foster home for a few months before going back to the centre. She told me she was miserable all the time, wishing to finally be adopted. And I think you’re wrong about her not remembering you. She told me that her special friend gave her the necklace and she’s been wearing it for as long as she can remember. She told me that he went away but the swan made her have hope. She even started calling herself Emma Swan because of it. She just doesn't recognize you after all this time is all.”

Killian stared at his sister, not knowing what to say. He felt more horrible than before, now that he knew he had such a good life, but his Swan didn’t. _Wait, his Swan? Since when is she yours Killian?_

“No Ruby, I definitely can’t tell her who I am. She’ll hate me for leaving her and having such a good life when she had the opposite. I won’t ever tell her who I really am and you better not tell her either Ruby or else.”

“Killian, you are thick headed and stubborn as an ox. She eventually got a good life. She’s here now. Mary Margaret and Graham’s parents adopted her. And she’s finally happy. It’s fate that you guys are finally back in each other’s lives. She deserves to know who you are.”

“Ruby I said NO!” Killian yelled at his sister. “Now get out of my room.”

Ruby gave Killian one final look before walking out of his room and back downstairs. She couldn’t believe him. For someone who made the dean’s list his first year for the engineering program, Ruby’s older brother was really stupid sometimes. She couldn't understand why on earth he didn't want Emma to know who he was to her. She figured she'd talk to Emma herself one day, even if it meant going against what Killian wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any errors. Hope you enjoyed. Reviews are appreciated. Thanks!


	4. Bachelor Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, sorry this took me so long to post - I was actually out of town all last week and forgot my laptop, and then I had some personal things going on.  
> Here is a short filler chapter to get you by. I hope to have the next chapter up by the end of this week. I'm almost at the point in the story where I lost most of my work, so need to do major editing in the couple of chapters I have remaining in order to move the story forward.

The next three months went by very quickly. Killian was spending his summer break working at the docks and there was a lot of wedding planning to be done. Being best friends with David for the last 10 years, Killian was asked to be the best man. Graham was one of the groomsmen, along with Victor and Jefferson. The maid of honour was Mary Margaret’s best friend, Regina, and Emma, Belle and Ella were the bridesmaids.

Although Killian thought a lot about Emma, he never actually had the nerve to talk to her. He really didn’t want her remembering who he was, in case she blamed him for how her life turned out. Which, he knew was just an excuse, but he still couldn’t help it. So he made sure he was never in the house when she came over, or that he was too busy to bother having a conversation past simple pleasantries. Ruby also never brought it up again either, which he took as a good sign in that she had probably not mentioned anything to Emma.

Killian organized a bachelor party for David, and the boys along with some of their other friends, except for Graham, as he was still too young, went to New York City for a very booze-filled weekend at the end of July, 2 weeks prior to the wedding. While at one of the bars, a beautiful girl with long brunette tresses caught Killian’s eye. She swayed over, placed her hands on the table the boys were occupying, directly in front of Killian and asked him if he wanted to play.

Killian was slightly taken back by her forwardness, but slowly stood up and leaned forward. “Not sure you can handle me, but I’ll give you a go,” he whispered right into her ear. Killian walked around the table, grabbed the girl by the waist and took her out onto the dance floor.

“The name’s Killian. Who might you be love?”

“I’m Milah” she replied with a nice sway of her behind, causing her to brush right up on Killian. They continued dancing, if it could be called dancing; it was more foreplay with hands touching and brushing every inch of each other’s clothed covered bodies.

“What do you say to moving this little dance back to your place?”

“I say, it’s about bloody time.” Killian grabbed a hold of Milah’s hand and dragged her out of the bar, hailed a taxi and took her to his hotel room.

* * *

The next morning, Killian woke up to banging on his door and an empty bed. David, Victor and Jefferson were waiting for him, and they all barged into the hotel room as soon as the door was opened.

“So who was the girl last night? You completely forgot about us when you met her. Didn’t even tell us her name. How inconsiderate of you. Wait, is she still here?” David rambled on; grating on Killian’s already pounding head.

“Bloody hell, mate! Can you keep it down? You might not have a hangover, but I bloody well do. And I barely slept a wink last night – was too busy getting busy.” The boys all whooped in laughter. “And no, she isn’t here. I guess she left early. The name was Milah by the way.” Killian walked over to the kitchenette and was about to start a pot of coffee, when he noticed a note sitting on the counter.

_Killian,_

_I had to go. I had a great night! Give me a call the next time you’re in the city. My number’s in your phone._

_Milah. XOX_

Killian wasn’t planning on giving her a call back, but he shoved the note in his pocket and got ready so that he could join the boys for breakfast before heading back to Boston.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Again sorry for the lateness and shortness of this chapter. I promise the next one will be longer.  
> ~KCJ


	5. Wedding Fever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is an extra long chapter to make up for the shortness of the previous one. Enjoy!

The two weeks before the wedding were very busy for all in the wedding party. Killian made sure all the tuxes were ready, and most importantly – that the wedding bands were. Finally, the big day arrived with Killian standing at the altar next to David.

When all the guests were finally seated by Graham, Victor and Jefferson, and the large oak double doors were closed, the groom, best man and groomsmen, stood patiently with the priest, waiting for the music to begin. As it did, the doors opened slowly and out stepped Emma. Even though she was only 14, she looked to be in her early 20s and was absolutely stunning. She wore a one-shouldered emerald green dress that cinched just above the waist before flowing out in a full skirt, ending right above the knees. She held a small bouquet of flowers in her hands and her hair was curled hanging loose over her shoulders. She had a bright smile of her face as she walked up the aisle, and when she passed Ruby and Neal, she gave them a small wave. But Killian couldn’t keep his eyes off of her.

“Pick your jaw up off the floor Killian and stop staring at my sister, she’s too young for you,” Graham grumbled under his breath while elbowing Killian in the side.

David held in a snort of laughter, and Killian quickly shook his head, but he still couldn’t take his eyes away from the beauty that was his little rugrat. He didn’t even notice that Belle and Ella had walked up behind Emma and were already standing on the other side of the altar. However, as the music changed, Killian, along with every person in the church, turned to face the oak doors at the end of the aisle, and waited for the bride.

Mary Margaret appeared in the doorway on the arm of her father, looking exactly like a princess. Her wedding gown was a full length skirt made of white swan feathers; the bodice, adorned with crystals and pearls. Killian gave David a quick glance. ”You’re a bloody lucky bastard” he whispered.

“I know!”

The wedding ceremony went by fairly quickly and soon enough the priest was announcing the new Mr. and Mrs. Nolan, with the bride and groom running down the aisle out of the church.

* * *

The reception was outdoors, in the grounds that adjoined the church. David and Mary Margaret had their first dance, before pulling all of the wedding party in to join. After a couple of rounds alternating partners, Killian got up his nerve and asked Emma if she wanted to dance. He pulled Emma tight into his embrace and swayed softly with her. “You look beautiful Emma.”

“Thanks Killian. You don’t look too bad yourself,” she replied with a soft laugh.

He had been too distracted by her beauty before to notice the circle swan pendant was still hanging off her neck, but he noticed it now as he held her in his arms. “I know I told you before, but that’s an interesting necklace you have their Emma.”

“Thank you again. It was a gift from someone long ago. It’s all I have left to remember him by. I don’t know where he is or how he is now. Heck I don’t even know what he looks like anymore.” Killian felt an ache deep in his chest, but he still couldn’t bring himself to tell her who he really was; that she didn’t need to wonder about her old friend anymore, that he was standing right in front of her. As the song slowly came to end, Killian took Emma’s hand in his and brought it up to his mouth. “I’m sure you’ll find him one day, Swan”. He kissed the back of her hand before letting go and walking over to Victor and Jefferson at the bar.

Suddenly, there was a light chime of a spoon on a glass, and Regina was asking everyone to take a seat so that some of the speeches could be made, hers being first, which made everyone laugh. Not five minutes later, and Regina was calling Killian to the microphone.

“Evening everyone. First off, I just want to thank the Nolan and Blanchard families for the wonderful evening they have put together, and to wish both families congratulations on their joining. Those of you who know me, know my story, but for those that don’t, I’m Killian. I was adopted by the Jones family about 10 years ago and brought to Boston, and it was the first day of school that I met David. I do have some very embarrassing stories about Dave from our time as young lads, but I think I’ll tell you about the day that we met  _Miss_ Mary Margaret Blanchard. It was the summer before grade 8, when we were just starting our teen years, and Dave and I were practicing football, hoping to join the team at school for the upcoming year, when my amazing throwing skills did end up landing Dave in some very hot water.”

Killian chuckled softly, as he continued. “As we all know, Dave isn’t the best football player, but he was even worse back then. As he was running backwards to catch the ball, he ended up running right into Mary Margaret, causing them both to tumble into the large water fountain that sits at the edge of the park. It was very amusing watching that scene fold out. Mary Margaret punched David in the head, knocking him out, landing him back in the water. When I eventually rescued David, and he regained consciousness, oh was there hell to pay. Mary Margaret was bloody furious. Asking him who he bloody well thought he was, not watching where he was going. When Dave asked her who she thought she was, she responded ‘ _I am Miss Mary Margaret Blanchard’_ .” Killian imitated Mary Margaret perfectly, posing with his hands on his hips, earning him a round of laughter and Mary Margaret protesting that she did not sound like that.

“It didn’t take long for Dave and me to finally become friends with Mary Margaret when we eventually started school that year. She was in almost all of our classes, and since we were the only people that she actually seemed to know, she did end up spending her first day with us, before we introduced her to the rest of the gang. Although the three of us met at the same time, anyone who has met them would know that there is a very special bond that the two of them share. It was noticeable back then as well, probably from that first punch…” Killian glanced out to the guests, knowing that he had them captivated by his story. He took a brief pause before he continued speaking, in a much softer tone of voice.

“There is something that is very rare in this world – true love, and the love and affection Dave and Mary hold for each other is just that. I am sure that many people must think that it is too early for them to be getting married; they are only 19 after all. But really, it has been a long time coming, this union. If we had it our way, they would have been married the first day they met, more than 6 years ago. Their souls certainly were. I have seen Mary and Dave go from pretending to dislike each other, to becoming great friends, to slowly falling in love with each other and realizing the importance they held in each other’s hearts. Watching the two of them is like watching a Disney fairy tale. There are ups and downs, but in the end true love conquers all. It’s very rare to find the kind of love that makes you feel that you are at home, and miss when it is taken away from you.” Killian paused in his speech again, looking wistful, thinking back to the home that he had left Emma in all those years ago. He cleared his throat, shook his head and continued.

“The love and support that Mary and Dave have for each other, brings me hope and longing. Hope because I wish to one day have what they have, and longing for when that day finally arrives. Seeing the two of them, becoming one today, was such a wonderful honour and it makes me feel special to have been a part of their journey. To David and Mary Margaret, may the love between you always be strong, true and eternal!” Killian didn’t realize it, but his eyes had wandered to where Emma was sitting, and lingered there for the remainder of his speech, going unnoticed by everyone but Ruby – who would definitely be bringing it up later in the evening. He was only shook out of his thoughts by thunderous applause and loud, obnoxious hooting from Victor and Jefferson. Killian moved to David and Mary Margaret, engulfing them in a large hug, and wiped Mary Margaret’s tears away, before the happy couple went to cut the cake.

When it was time to throw the bouquet, Emma was beyond surprised to be the one to have caught it; and when Killian caught the garter, all he got was heckling about who his unlucky bride would end up being. “Maybe it’ll be that voluptuous brunette you plundered back in New York Killian!” Victor was quick to shout, which earned a very deadly look going Victor’s way by Killian, and a very curious glance to Killian by Emma.

Unbeknownst to Killian, Ruby and Graham were coming up with a very thoughtful plan. Ruby had already told Graham who Killian and Emma were to each other, and so not even five minutes later Graham was grabbing the microphone and trying to get everyone’s attention.

“Hi everyone, before you all carry on with your evening, I was just informed that there is one big part of the throwing of the bouquet and garter tradition that we are forgetting to do. So, I would like to call my other lovely sister, Emma, up on the dancefloor and get her to take a seat on the chair. And I need the ugly dude who caught the garter up here as well.”

Killian had no idea what was going on, but made his way back to the dancefloor, “who do you think you’re calling ugly Graham. I think you mean dashing.”

“You wish Killian! Now if we are to be doing these wedding traditions, we need to be doing them properly. As such, the tradition goes that the man that catches the garter then has to place it on the leg of the lady who caught the bouquet. And for every inch above the knee it goes, the longer and happier will be David’s marriage to Mary. So, no backing out on this you guys. This is for your sister Ems, and your best mate Killian.”

Emma had been protesting to the turn of events, but as the guests all started cheering and laughing for them to not back down, Emma turned to Killian with a big smile on her face. “We don’t want to be the reason they have bad luck in their marriage, do we?”

Killian didn’t know what to do, he gave Ruby a look that indicated he knew she was behind this and would be killing her in her sleep, but he brushed it off, gave everyone a big laugh and with a smirk on his face, said that it would be his ultimate pleasure. He knelt down in front of Emma, who was holding her leg out, and as the crowd cat-called them, Killian slipped the garter over Emma’s shoe and was about to slide it up her leg, when he heard someone call out, “Killian – you have to use your mouth. It should be the opposite of how Dave removed it from Mary Margaret,” and he hesitated. “Are you sure about this Emma? I can stop if you want?”

“It’s all in good fun Killian. I don’t mind and Neal doesn’t mind either,” she replied back with a quick smile over to Neal who was standing to the side laughing. So Killian hesitantly took the garter in his mouth and slowly worked it up Emma’s leg, however as soon as he reached her knee, he chickened out and used his hand to pull it up her thigh. The crowd was laughing and yelling that he had cheated, but he didn’t care.

“Well Killian, that was fun, and it looks to me that Mary Margaret and David will have at least 5 years of a happy marriage since you stopped 5 inches above my knee. Though I have to agree with the crowd – you did end up cheating your way up my leg.” Emma was being a bit flirtatious with Killian, but her big smile indicated that it was all in good fun.

“Well princess, I can’t have your boyfriend going all jealous on me because I made it further than he has,” Killian was quick to joke back with her. “Anyways, rugrat I’m glad you had fun, but it’s time for me to head back over to the boys and have a drink.” Killian turned away from Emma, not even realising that his term of endearment for her had slipped out, just shaking his head with a smile on his face thinking about what his little sister had just put him through.

However, Emma was still standing on the dancefloor staring after him in confusion. There was only one person in her life that had ever called her rugrat, and that had been 10 years ago. But she brushed it off as a coincidence, for surely if this was  _her_ Killi, he would have told her something when he saw her swan necklace, right. She didn’t get much chance to keep thinking about it though as she was soon engulfed by Neal, Ruby and Graham, and soon all four were laughing at what had just happened.

The rest of the night went by in a blur. At one point, Killian had words with Ruby about what she and Graham had concocted, but Ruby just turned the tables on him, giving him hell about the very telling glances he had been giving Emma all day long. She again suggested that he should tell Emma who he was, and once again Killian rejected the idea, informing Ruby that there was no point, as he would be heading back to Rutgers the next day, and that Emma was finally happy and his telling her would only ruin it. Aside from his conversation with Ruby, Killian spent the remainder of the evening enjoying with his friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, hope you enjoyed the chapter. I have some ideas moving forward with this story, but I would love to get your opinion on how long I should wait before Emma discovers who Killian is, and how exactly she should find out. I'm bouncing a few ideas around in my head, but not sure what to go with - so your input would be greatly appreciated.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	6. Uni Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is another chapter. It's another filler chapter, but the next one should be a bit more of a doozy.  
> Enjoy! :)

When Killian went back to Rutgers after David’s and Mary Margaret’s wedding, and was finally back in the rhythm of the school year, he decided to call Milah and ask her out on a date. He found out that she was in her 4th and final year at NYU and stayed in Jersey City, but they still decided to give it a shot. One date, led to two, which led to a third and soon enough Milah and Killian were inseparable, and though it was tough being about an hour away from each other, they made it work. Killian told Milah how he wanted to join the Navy after graduation and Milah told him all about her plans for becoming a fashion designer, and how she was starting a job at one of Gold Communications fashion magazines as an assistant in the summer. Milah didn’t have too much of a family and loved hearing all about Killian’s, especially stories about Ruby and Liam, as she was an only child. Killian also told Milah about Emma and Milah supported him in his not wanting to reveal who he was to her.

The summer after Milah’s graduation from NYU, she began her job at Gold’s fashion magazine. Killian found a job in New York as well, so for the summer he moved in with Milah at her apartment in Jersey City. His job with the Harbour Patrol kept him quite busy and he never got the chance to go back home to Boston.

Killian’s 3rd year at university was similar, though extremely busy. He was working himself to the ground – if he wasn’t studying, he was playing football, or training. His summers were spent back in NYC working at the Harbour Patrol. Throughout all of this, he kept his relationship with Milah, who never seemed to mind his being so busy, since she was also working very long hours. She started moving up the chain rather quickly for someone who had only recently started working there, but she loved the work she was doing. Killian and Milah spent every weekend together and during the week they alternated going between New Brunswick and Jersey City. Milah also attended all his home football games or the ones that were played in NYC.

Although Killian’s 2nd and 3 rd years were manageable, his 4 th and final year wasn’t. He was so busy with football and classes that he ended up spending less and less time with Milah, really only seeing her on the weekends. They still spoke on the phone every night and Milah was being very supportive of how busy Killian was. He spent his final semester studying day and night and completing his thesis, but when he was now done, all his hard work paid off; earning him a spot on the Dean’s list.

Over the 3 years, Killian only made it out to Boston for the holidays: Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter. Milah never came with him, always insisting that she was never a family holiday type of person, and Killian always accepted her reasons, never questioning them. However, his family always asked when they would finally get to meet the girl who occupied his heart. Killian rarely saw Emma during those visits, but when he did, he never spoke more than a few words to her. In his mind, he was happy with his life and she was happy with hers, so why should he go ruining it by bringing up things that had now happened over 10 years ago.

* * *

For Emma, the three years passed by very quickly. She and Neal were still going out and spent all their time with Ruby and Graham, who was now in his 2nd year at Boston University. Emma felt like she finally belonged and was really a part of a family. Mary Margaret and David would be over all the time – they still lived in Boston - and Emma loved babysitting for her nephew, who was born a year after the wedding. Occasionally, Ruby would try to bring up Emma’s time at the foster centre and get her to talk about the swan pendant, but Emma’s responses always consisted of “It’s all in the past,” “There’s no use bringing it up now and wondering about him,” or “He’s probably happy and doesn’t remember me.” Ruby would try to convince Emma that her mysterious person from the past was probably closer than she realised, but Emma would close off and not continue with the conversation. Ruby even tried to get Graham to talk to Emma about it, but Graham, always looking out for his little sister, would tell Ruby that she should stop; it was Emma’s decision if she didn’t want to talk or think about her past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. Feedback is always appreciated.  
> ~KCJ


	7. Convocation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, sorry this took me so long to post. I had a case of writers block. I completely changed the direction of the story, with my last chapter, from what I had originally written last year and subsequently lost, so I wasn't sure how I wanted to proceed with this chapter. And I've been spending my free time binge watching all the Marvel Cinematic Universe movies and watching 4 seasons of the tv show Greek, which I only discovered after reading a Captain Swan fanfic that was inspired by it.
> 
> So again, sorry, but I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Time had flown by. Killian spent the month between final exams and convocation moving out of his apartment in New Brunswick and into Milah’s apartment in Jersey City, and just enjoying his free time.

His family was coming down for his convocation, but Killian wanted Emma to be there as well, which he divulged to Ruby. Ruby and Graham decided that since Emma had never been to New York City before, she and Graham should come with the Jones’ to New York for the weekend and attend Killian’s ceremony on Monday morning. They spent the weekend enjoying the sites and Killian loved seeing the look of amazement and wonder on Emma’s face as she took it all in. Milah was busy working over the weekend, since she was taking Monday off, so she was only introduced to everyone on Monday morning when they drove to Rutgers for the ceremony. Killian’s family was extremely proud of him, and when his name was called so that he could retrieve his degree, both Ruby and Liam shouted out their excitement.

Once the ceremony was over and after countless pictures, they all headed back to New York for lunch.

Finally settled into a nice restaurant the group was able to just sit back and relax, and let the conversations flow.

“Milah honey, now that we actually have a moment to talk without all the excitement of convocation, why don’t you tell us a bit more about yourself.”

“I’m not sure where to start Mrs. Jones. I’m sure Killian has told you about my family, or lack thereof.”

“Yes, Milah, he has, and you don’t have to about anything you don’t want to. Killian lost his parents at a young age as well, but he became a part of our family. And if you need us, we can be there for you as well.”

“Ha! Mom’s right Milah. We love taking in strays like Killian,” Liam said with a chuckle.

“Oi Liam, shut it why don’t you!”

“But Killian, Liam’s right. We took you in, the Blanchards took Emma in; we love adding people into the family. Don’t we Graham?”

“Yes Ruby,” Graham answered with an eye roll. “But Milah, they’re all right. This family is the best, so if you need anything, you can have all of us.”

“I know that. And Mr. and Mrs. Jones you all are very wonderful. Killian has been great these past few years. He’s helped me a lot and he is completely supportive of all the long hours that I endure at work.”

“Oh Milah, please tell me about Mr. Gold. Have you met him? Is he as good looking in person as he is in the pictures? Do you guys know that Gold Communications is the leading advertising and magazine agency in America? It’s great! I think I want to work there too. Milah do you think you can get me a job?”

“Gees Ruby, calm down. Milah’s gonna think you’re a crazy person.”

“But Emma, this is Robert Gold we’re talking about. Do you even know who he is?”

“Ruby, one day I will definitely introduce you to Mr. Gold. And to answer your question, yes I have seen him in person, but I never actually met him. He is much better looking in real life; the pictures do not do him justice.”

“But not as good looking as me, right?” Killian interrupted, winking.

“Oh little brother, no one in the entire world is as good looking as you are.”

“That’s younger brother, brother.”

The teasing and laughing continued throughout the meal and soon enough it was time to head out.

“Ok kids. I think it’s time for us to head home.” Mr. Jones said after some time. “It was great finally meeting you Milah.”

“You too. I had a lovely time. Thank you for letting me celebrate the day with you.”

“Bye Killian, we’ll see you back in Boston for Ruby and Emma’s graduation right? Milah I hope you will be able to join us.”

“Yes mom, I will definitely be there, but unfortunately Milah won’t. She has a work conference here that week.”

“Ok. Well we better get going kids. See you soon.”

After a couple of more minutes of hugs and goodbyes, Milah and Killian remained in the restaurant.

“So that was Emma. She’s a really nice girl Killian. You should be proud of her; she’s come a long way based on what you told me.”

“I know Milah. Believe me, I am proud of her, I just wish I could tell her that I was the one who gave her that swan keychain. I just don’t know –“

“You gave me this swan keychain?!”

Killian quickly turned around at the interruption and saw Emma standing right behind him with a look of shock on her face.

Killian quickly stood up and faced Emma. “Emma, I, I, um, I thought you guys had already left. What are you doing back in here?”

“Really Killian? That’s all you have to say. I forgot my phone, that’s what I’m doing back in here,” Emma whispered while pointed to where her cell was still lying on the table. “You know me? You’re the Killi from when I was a baby. You’re the one who gave me this swan keychain so that I’d never forget you!” The more that Emma talked, the more agitated she was becoming and her voice was starting to become louder and louder.

“Yes Emma. Yes to all of what you said. You are my little rugrat, and I’ve never forgotten about you. I have always wondered where you ended up, if you were ok, if you got adopted by a good family like I was lucky enough to have had.”

“Well Killi” Emma said his name as if she was spitting something foul tasting out of her mouth, “just so you know. No I wasn’t ok, not for a long time. I wasn’t happy; I had a miserable childhood after you left me without a word.”

“But Emma, I did want to say bye to you in person, but I couldn’t. I would’ve stayed with you forever if I could.”

“Emma, Killian, please calm down. If you need to discuss this, we should probably go outside. People are starting to look over at us.”

“No, Milah, that’s ok. There’s nothing more to discuss. I need to go home anyways. Just answer me one question Killian. How long have you known who I was?”

“Emma, rugrat, please,” Killian didn’t know what to say. He was worried how she would take the news.

“Killian, just answer the question.”

“Emma, I figured it out the moment I came home and saw you again the first time. When I told you that I liked your necklace,” Killian softly told her, feeling so ashamed of himself that he couldn’t look Emma in the eye.

“Three years. You’ve known this whole time and you never bothered to tell me. But obviously other people know. Well that’s it then. You didn’t want me to know, so now we’ll pretend like you’re just my best friend’s older brother and nothing more.” With those final words Emma reached up to the back of her neck and unclasped her necklace. She dropped the swan pendant on the table in front of Killian, grabbed her cellphone and turned to walk out of the restaurant.

Killian hastily grabbed the necklace and scrambled after her, “Emma please wait. I was scared to tell you. I didn’t know how much you remembered from back then. And I was worried that you would be angry at me for leaving you and having a good life.”

By this point they were already outside and almost to the Jones family car, where Graham and Ruby were waiting outside of. Liam and his parents were nowhere to be seen though. Graham and Ruby quickly glanced up in surprise at the commotion that Killian was causing running after Emma.  Emma ran right into her brother’s arms sobbing.

“Emma, hun, what’s wrong?” Ruby asked, but when Emma didn’t answer she turned to Killian. “Killian what happened?”

“She overheard Milah and me talking about her, and she knows Ruby. She knows.”

“Oh Killian, I told you that you should’ve told her yourself.”

“Wait, what?!” Emma pulled out of Graham’s arms and turned to face Ruby. “You knew as well. Who else knew? Am I the only person that had no idea that Killian was my Killi?”

“Sis, it’s ok. Please stop crying. Only Ruby and I knew. But we didn’t know how to tell you. We thought that Killian should be the one to tell you.” Graham tried comforting his little sister, and kept rubbing his hand up and down her back.

“Graham you’re MY brother. How come you didn’t tell me? You know more that anyone what my story is. You should have told me.”

“I know sis. I should have told you. And I’m so sorry. But if I know you as well as I think I do, deep down somewhere inside of you, you’re glad to finally find your Killi and be reunited with him.” Graham glanced over his sister’s shoulder and gave Killian a small smile. Killian was standing a few feet away with Milah, trying to give Emma some space, but now stepped forward.

“Rugrat, please listen to me,” he reached out to touch Emma’s arm, but she jerked away from him.

“No! I don’t want you near me!” Emma turned around to face Killian, shouting at him. Her tears were all dry at this point and now she looked furious. “I may not be yelling at Graham and Ruby right this instant, but that doesn’t mean I’m not angry with them for not telling me. But you! You, I don’t think I can ever forgive for not telling me. Three years Killian! You saw me after 10 years and you knew who I was. You more than anyone else know what it’s like living in the system and how it can be. You should have told me as soon as you saw me. I cried myself to sleep for weeks and weeks after you were gone.”

“Kids, what is going on here?” Mr. Jones called out to them. Everyone turned at the sudden voice to see Mr. and Mrs. Jones and Liam walking to the car with coffees in their hands. Killain just stood in his spot, staring at Emma, who was staring back at him, fists clenched by her side.

“Will someone please tell us what is going on,” Mrs. Jones asked.

“Mom, we’ll explain later, when we get home. But the short story is that Killian knows Emma from the foster centre where you brought him from and Emma just found out.”

“Oh honey,” Mrs. Jones rushed over to Emma, pulling her into a hug, while Liam walked over to his brother and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Ok. I think everyone should get into the car and we should go home and discuss this when we’ve all calmed down.”

“Emma, please listen to me,” Killian began.

“No Killian! I don’t want to talk to you. And I don’t think I’ll ever forgive you for this.”

“Please take your necklace back at least,” Killian held it out to her.

“No, I don’t need it anymore. Cathy said you were giving it to me so I would always remember you. Well I did. And now I know who you are, so I don’t need it anymore. You know I had a weird feeling at Mary and David's wedding. You called me rugrat, and I thought that maybe it was my Killi. But then I was so sure that my Killi would have told me immediately who he was. And that was only a few months after meeting you. If you had told me then, I would have been happy to have you back in my life. But now, it's been three years. So no, I won't take back the necklace, because I don’t want it anymore; now I just want to forget who you are.”

“Emma, please, you don’t mean that. You’re just angry with me right now. I’m so sorry that I didn’t tell you three years ago when I first saw you. Please you have to forgive me.”

“Killian, I think maybe you and Milah should go home,” Liam interrupted. “Ruby, Graham, help Emma into the van. Here dad, pass me the keys, I’ll drive right now.”

Killian and Milah watched as his family got into their car and drove away.

“Killian, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have even mentioned Emma when they had only just left the restaurant.”

“Milah, stop. It’s not your fault. How were you to know that Emma would come back in because she left her cellphone? It’s all my fault. I should have told her three years ago. This is my mistake, not yours.” Killian was clenching the swan necklace in his fist, and staring down the road in the direction that his family had driven off. Milah gently tugged on his arm and walked him towards their car so that they could head back home as well.

“Don’t worry Killian. I’m sure she’ll come around with time. She was just surprised.”

“I hope you’re right Milah, I hope you’re right.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Emma knows!!!! I hope you like how she found out. Please let me know in the comments.  
> Also, as a side note - the Robert Gold in my story is younger than Rumple, and better looking (in my opinion). Nothing against Robert Carlyle, but he just isn't my type. Just taking some creative liberties. :)
> 
> ~KCJ


	8. High School Grad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I realised that in a previous chapter where I mention David and Mary Margaret having a child, I never named him. So, I decided his name will be James. He is mentioned in this chapter, so I wanted to clear that up.  
> Enjoy!

“Hi Emma, it’s Killian. I know you’re upset with me, but please call back or pick up so I can explain. I didn’t want to hide the truth from you, but I was just scared. Please Rugrat.”

~~~***~~~

K: _Emma, please call me._

~~~***~~~

K: _Emma, please. I am really sorry._

~~~***~~~

K: _Emma, please answer your phone. You’ve been ignoring all my calls and texts for over a week._

~~~***~~~

K: _Graham, can you please ask Emma to call me?_

G: _Hey Killian. I know you want to talk to Emma, but she really doesn’t want to talk to you. She’s still upset. Just give her time. Maybe once exams are done, she’ll want to listen, but for now, I think she just wants to focus on finishing school._

K: _Ok, Graham, thanks for letting me know. I’ll try again in a couple of weeks._

~~~***~~~

K: _Emma, I just want to wish you good luck on your exams. You’ll do great!_

~~~***~~~

K: _Hi Emma, I hope your exams went well. Ruby told me that you think you got A’s all around. Good job! I’ll be coming up to Boston for the graduation ceremony. I would really like it if we could talk before then. I really want us to try and be friends. Please give me a call._

* * *

It had been almost a month since Killian’s convocation ceremony and now it was time for Ruby and Emma’s.  Killian had tried his best to get a hold of Emma, to try and explain why he never told her the truth, but to no avail. Both Milah and Ruby kept telling him to give it time, and that eventually Emma would be ready to talk. But that he couldn’t expect that she would be ok with it so soon, especially since he had 3 years to come to terms with who they were to each other.

As was somewhat the norm, Killain went back to Boston without Milah, due to her having a work conference. The graduation ceremony was on the Friday, with grad prom on Saturday night. Killian arrived in Boston on Thursday afternoon, and would head back to New York on Sunday evening.

Killian sat in the audience with his family, Mr. and Mrs. Blanchard, Graham, Mary Margaret, David and little James. As he watched his little sister with her friends, he couldn’t help but think how happy he was for not only her, but especially for Emma. He was so proud of Emma finally having what she always deserved and he couldn’t help but admire how she was turning into a very beautiful young lady, at 17. He just wished that things were different between them and that they would be able to be a part of each other’s lives.

As soon as the ceremony was over, Ruby ran over to Graham. She couldn’t stop laughing and no one could understand a word she was saying. Emma and Neal walked over to them as well and everyone was hugging each other, congratulating the new graduates. Killian watched Emma as she talked with her family and held James in her arms.

“Hi Emma, congratulations!” Killian quietly said as he approached her. “I know you don’t want to talk but I just wanted to tell you how proud of you I am, and that I’m really happy that you were finally able to have the life that you always deserved, with loads of people who love and care for you.” Without waiting for a reply, he turned around and walked over to Liam. Although he really wanted to clear the air, he knew that now wasn’t the time. Emma, for her part, was utterly confused, as she had expected that Killian would put up a fuss on wanting to talk. But she was also very glad, as she still wasn’t ready.

* * *

That evening the Jones family went for dinner to celebrate. Milah was brought up in their conversation and Killian admitted that he was thinking about proposing, to which the entire family couldn’t have been more pleased by.

“Oh wow! This is great! I can’t believe it, I really like Milah, Killian. I think you should go home tomorrow and surprise her. Don’t wait until Sun to go back.” Ruby couldn’t stop gushing.

“Hold up Ruby. I don’t even have a ring yet.”

“We can go buy one tomorrow,” Ruby interrupted him.

“How are we going to go tomorrow, when you have prom?”

“Well we can go in the morning and pick one out. Then you wait till Graham picks me up and then you drive back to the City. You’ll be there before midnight. It’ll be soo romantic, she’ll already be asleep, you can sneak into your place and wake her up with sweet little kisses, pull out the ring, and boom! You pop the question!”

“I do like your plans Ruby. We’ll see. There is no rush.”

However, much to Killian’s chagrin, Ruby woke him up early the next morning and dragged him out to the jewelry store with Liam in tow, and after 2 hours, they found a nice white gold ring, with a small round diamond. Nothing overly fancy, but just right for Milah.

The rest of the afternoon passed fairly quickly. Ruby kept barging into his room asking him what he thought of various hair styles before deciding on a final one. The doorbell rang at 6:30 with Graham, Neal and Emma standing at the door, a waiting limo parked on the street.

Upon seeing Emma, all Killian could do was stare. She was wearing a turquoise blue spaghetti strap dress, and had never looked as beautiful as she did then. “Hey Killian” Graham interrupted his thoughts, making him finally take his eyes off of Emma and look at Graham and Neal.

“Neal, Graham, you guys sure decked out for tonight” Killian greeted them. “Emma you look lovely. Come on in. I’ll let Ruby know you’re all here.” He held the door for them and then ran up the stairs to get Ruby, before going back down. As they waited, he noticed that Emma was doing everything she could to avoid him, so he did his best to stay away from her, so that he wouldn’t make things harder for her. At one point, Graham told him that things would get better, and for him to just continue being patient with Emma.

When Ruby finally came down the stairs, wearing a blood red halter dress, she ran right into Graham’s arms. The two couples posed for an endless amount of pictures and then there was an endless amount of family pictures for the Jones’. After rushed hugs and mutterings of “have fun” and “don’t get in trouble” the girls left the house with their dates, looking very radiant.

“Killain…” Ruby rushed back into the house, throwing her arms around her brother, “good luck with the proposal. You’re going right now ok. You better not be home when I get back. I love you” she kissed Killian on the cheek and ran out of the house before Killian could get a word in edge wise.

Killian’s family all gathered around him, and talked him into heading back to New York right away. “Look honey,” Killian’s mom started, “you love this girl. We love this girl. She makes you really happy. And you have been with her for 3 years now. Do what Ruby said. It’ll be a big surprise. Call us in the morning ok.”

It seemed like everyone was all for it, so what did Killian have to lose. He decided they were right. He quickly got his bag together and left before he could change his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> ~KCJ


	9. Surprise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, quick note - I made a small mistake with Emma’s age in the previous chapter – I said she was 18, but she should still be 17. I made the change in the chapter. I am going with the assumption that Killian’s birthday is in January like Colin (unless I missed them giving a bday to Killian in the show), and Emma’s bday is Oct, since in the show her bday was the 1st episode. This would go with how I have a 5 year age difference, but in school they are only 4 years apart.

By the time Killian made it to New York it was 11 pm. Not yet too late, but late enough that he hoped Milah was at home. When he entered the apartment all the lights were off, but there was soft music playing and the air smelled like candles, though none were currently burning. Killian assumed that Milah had had a relaxing night to herself, as she often did, and had forgotten to turn off the music, so he turned it off before heading to their bedroom.

Killian left his bag in the family room, only taking the engagement ring box and sticking it into his pocket. When Killian got to their bedroom door, he quietly turned the handle. He could hear soft moaning coming from inside.

_What the hell is going on?  I wonder if she’s dreaming about me. It would be a good way to wake her up, if I make her dream into a reality right now._ Killian couldn’t help but think, smirking.

However, when he finally pushed the door open, he couldn’t believe his eyes. Milah most definitely was not dreaming about him. If the shadows he saw by the candlelight indicated anything at all, it was that Milah wasn’t even alone.

“What the hell is going on?” Killian shouted while flipping on the light switch. Milah quickly sat up and covered herself.

“Killian, it’s not what you think.”

“IT’S NOT WHAT I THINK?! WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!”

Milah scrambled up off the bed, put on her robe and placed her hand on Killian’s arm. “Please Killian, stop yelling. I can explain. It’s not what it looks like.”

Killian yanked his arm away, “It’s not what it looks like? Are you trying to tell me that I am not currently seeing another man in our bed? Did I not just see you going at it with a man that most certainly is not me? Please tell me that it’s not what it looks like, because I must certainly be seeing things, right?”

The man who was in Killian’s bed got up then. He was an attractive man, in his early thirties, even Killian couldn’t deny that.

“I assume you are Killian. I am Robert Gold, of Gold Communications. I’m sorry we had to meet this way.”

“Please shut up. I don’t care who the hell you are. I am talking to my girlfriend and I want her to tell me what the bloody hell she thinks she is doing.”

“I think I’ll just go then. Milah, I will see you on Monday.” Gold grabbed his clothes and walked out of the room. For a few minutes, neither Milah nor Killian said a word. When they finally heard the front door close, Milah sighed.

“Killian, it’s no big deal.” Milah tried shoving it under the rug.

“Milah, please don’t try to make me seem daft. I have eyes and I have brains. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what is going on. I just want to know why. Why would you cheat on me?”

“I’m sorry Killian. I don’t really know what to tell you. You have been amazing these past few years. And I really do love you, but you just weren’t around as much. And this thing that’s going on with Emma has been your sole focus the last month. You’ve barely paid me any attention.

“You want to blame this on Emma? You know she is the first person I considered family after my parents died. I have never hidden anything from you regarding her. Please don’t insult her or me by saying this has anything to do with that. Besides, that doesn’t give you the excuse to cheat on me. If you had a problem this past month, you should have talked to me about it.”

“I’m not blaming this on Emma. I’m just saying that this entire past year you have not been around as much. I’ve been pushed aside.”

“Milah, I finished my final year of engineering this past year. You have always been supportive of me. I gave you all of my free time over the past year. And I’ve been living with you since the moment I finished my last exam. I have been here 24/7 – while you’ve been busy with work. Milah you have never even once come home to Boston with me. And you are trying to tell me that I have not been around as much.”

Milah sat down on the bed, not knowing what to say.

“How long has this been going on Milah?”

“It hasn’t Killian, I swear. This was the first time it has ever happened. I mean I’ve met Robert a few times before at various work events, but tonight was the first time this has happened.”

“You mean the first time it happened with Gold, right? So has it happened with someone else over the last year?”

“No Killian, I swear, this was the first time it happened with anyone. I have never been with anyone except for you these past 3 years. I swear tonight was a mistake. There was a dinner, and drinking, and we were all just having a good time. And I don’t know what happened.”

“So was the mistake you trying to sleep your way to the top of the company, Milah? Because I find it hard to believe that you don’t know how and what happened tonight. It must have happened too fast for you to not notice that another man brought you home, and that you lit all of the candles in the apartment and put on music, right.” Killian sarcastically said. “I don’t know how you could do this Milah. If you love me as you say you do, you never would have done this. I can’t forgive you for this, because I don’t know if I can ever trust you again. And I certainly don’t believe your story right now.”

“Please Killian, I’m sorry, please don’t do what I think you are going to do. I swear it will never happen again.”

“It’s too late Milah. It shouldn’t have happened in the first place. If you felt like I wasn’t paying enough attention to you, you could have told me. And I honestly don’t think that I haven’t been, as I have been with you every single day for the last 3 months. If you wanted out of this relationship, you didn’t need to cheat on me to get it”

“I don’t want out of this relationship. Please Killian, we can work through this. You have to forgive me, please.”

“I can’t forgive you for this Milah. I came home early to surprise you, but instead it was me who got the biggest surprise of his life.” Killian threw the ring box onto the bed and started walking towards the door. Before he stepped out, he paused and said over his shoulder, “You better not be home tomorrow. I don’t want to see your lying, cheating face when I come to collect my things. We’re over.” With that, Killian slammed the bedroom door shut, grabbed his duffle bag and left the apartment, not giving Milah another chance.

Once outside the building, he hailed a cab and went to his buddy August’s place. August was a friend from Rutgers who had played football with him, and the only close friend of Killian’s who was living in New York City.

Although it was only past midnight, Killian was hoping that his friend would be at home; otherwise he would end up waiting for hours for August. Luckily, August answered the banging on his door, and Killian shoved his way in without a word. Killian went to the kitchen and grabbed a beer before throwing himself onto the couch.

“Tough night, bro?”

“You have no idea. But I’m not in the mood to talk. I just need a place to crash tonight. I’ll be gone tomorrow.”

“Buddy, you can stay as long as you want, you know that. Let me know if you need anything. We’ll talk in the morning.”

Killian grunted a goodnight and August went to his room. He couldn’t believe what had happened. How the hell could Milah have cheated on him? Had he not been enough for her? Sure, he had been a bit preoccupied about Emma this past month, but it’s not like he had stopped paying attention to Milah. And for her to say that Killian had been pulling away over the past year, that was nonsense. He was finishing school, dammit! Of course he had been busy. Killian didn’t know what to think, had there been signs he had missed over the last year, indicating that Milah was unhappy? He didn’t think so, she seemed entirely happy when she had finally met his family the month before. Killian just didn’t know what to think. Though he was certain of one thing for sure, he and Milah were over. There went his plans to start a family with her. He would pack up his things and head back to Boston tomorrow, and then on Monday he would let his employer know that he would be ending early due to personal reasons. After what felt like ages, Killian was finally able to fall into a restless sleep, tossing and turning all night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To onceinalifetime1, was this anywhere close to the gut feeling you had? Let me know. 
> 
> Thank you to all of my readers for all of your supportive comments, and for actually reading this. :)
> 
> ~KCJ


	10. Moving Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi sorry it's been so long since I've updated. I've had guests the last couple of weeks and I've been sick for about a week. Anyways, here's a short chapter to keep things moving. Enjoy!

When Killian woke up from a very restless sleep the next morning, he stumbled around August’s apartment not knowing what to do.

“You wanna talk about it?” August’s voice came from behind Killian, causing him to jump.

“Milah. I caught her with someone last night. I came home early to pop the big question, and there was another bloody fool in my bed.” Killian hadn’t planned on telling August what happened, but once he started, he just couldn’t seem to contain himself, and the angrier he felt.

“I just can’t believe she would do something like this to me, man. I gave her 3 bloody years of my life, and she threw it away in one night.”

“I’m sorry man. You can stay here as long as you need.”

“No, it’s ok. I’m gonna go back home to Boston. I just want to go and pack my stuff up and hit the road.  Just let me shower and I’ll be out of here soon.”

“I’ll come help you. It’ll make it go quicker.”

“Thanks brother. I appreciate it.”

An hour later, after a nice long shower and breakfast, Killian and August headed over to his apartment, Killian hoping that Milah had heeded his request of not being there today. However, it seemed that this day would not go his way either.

As soon as he opened the apartment door and stepped into the living room Milah came out of the bedroom.

“Killian, I’m so glad you’re here. Please you have to let me explain. It was a mistake and I promise it won’t happen again. But you can’t leave me. I love you, and I want to marry you. I accept your proposal.”

Killian just stared at her like she was certifiably insane. “Milah are you daft?! I didn’t even get the chance to propose, so you can’t even accept. And hell, if I would even consider proposing to you now after what you did to me. I love you Milah, I really do. But we can never be together again. I can’t forgive you for this. This was unacceptable to me. I honestly think that the only reason you are sorry is because I caught you. Would you have told me what happened if I hadn’t come back home early Milah? If I had ended up coming home today, as planned? I don’t think so. You would have hidden it from me. But it doesn’t change the fact that you still did it. So, no,  Milah I will not let you try to explain because there is no explanation good enough to excuse what you did. Now please leave, so I can pack in peace and go back home.”

“Killian, please.” Milah had tears streaming down her face, but Killian turned away and headed towards the bedroom.

“Whatever I don’t take with me today, I’ll get August to take care of for me. Goodbye Milah.” With that, August gently guided Milah out of the apartment and closed the door behind her.

Killian caught sight of the engagement ring sitting on the dresser when he walked into the bedroom. He picked it up and, gathered his thoughts for a few minutes, before putting it back down and getting his suitcase out of the closet.

He and August spent the majority of the day packing and loading up his car, with only a few items going into August’s for temporary storage. At about 5, everything was taken care of, and Killian was ready to head home. He had told August what to take care of and August agreed to make a trip up to Boston in a couple of weeks with the remainder of Killian’s things.

“Thanks, buddy. We’ll talk soon.”

“No problem. I’m really sorry about all of this. Let me know if you need anything else. I’m here for you.”

“I appreciate it.” With a final look around his bedroom, Killian grabbed the engagement ring and walked out of his shared New York City apartment, locked the door and gave August the keys. They headed down to their cars and with a final pat on the back Killian got in his car and drove off.

* * *

It was barely past 9 pm when Killian arrived home in Boston. He opened the front door and headed into the kitchen, where he saw that the lights were still on.

“Hey mom, Ruby.”

“Killian, honey what are you doing here?”

“Ya Killian, how come you’re home? And how come you haven’t answered your phone all day? I tried calling you so many times. I wanted to ask you how the proposal went and tell you all about prom.” Ruby couldn’t help her excitement, but as she looked more closely at Killian’s face, she knew something was wrong.

“Killian. What happened?”

“There was no proposal. I found her in bed with Robert Gold.”

Ruby and Mrs. Jones were shocked. “What??!!”

“Look guys, I’m exhausted. I really don’t have the energy to explain today. Can we talk tomorrow?”

“Of course, honey. We’re so sorry. Go on up; I’ll bring you something to eat.” Mrs. Jones walked over to her son and enveloped him in a hug. She kissed him on his forehead and let him go out of the kitchen.

Killian walked out of the kitchen and headed up to his room. It was going to be another long night for him and he was beyond tired, but he wished that sleep would come to him and help him forget for a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. I know there hasn't been much of Emma and Killian interaction lately. But don't worry - it will be back soon.  
> Please continue reading, and leave a comment.
> 
> Thanks,  
> KCJ


	11. The Picture

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, Sorry it's been a while - I've been suffering from some major writer's block, and everything that happened after Killian found Milah cheating has completely gone in a different direction that what I had originally planned.
> 
> This is a short chapter, but hopefully I overcome the block and get some more ideas to move the story forward.
> 
> Enjoy!

The following week passed very slowly for Killian. He mostly stayed to himself, which was very unusual for the normally charming and overly friendly man. He called the Navy recruitment office and found out that he did not have to wait until the fall to attend training, he would be able to go right after the Fourth of July, and so he decided that would be the best thing for him to do to keep his mind occupied.

Killian would be going to Great Lakes, Illinois for 8 weeks of boot camp, and following that he would head to Newport, Rhode Island for 12 weeks of Officer Candidate School.  If all went well, Killian would be back in Boston by the new year as a Naval Officer, following in his brother’s footsteps. Killian was actually quite glad to have things move up ahead of schedule. With his earlier plan, he would not have even started Boot Camp until the fall, and now he would be completing it at that time. Now, Killian couldn’t wait to get to Boot Camp so that he could focus all his pain and anger into something worthwhile.

Milah had been calling Killian constantly, leaving voicemails and texts asking Killian to call her back and apologising for what she had done, but Killian didn’t respond. The hurt and betrayal was still too fresh for him. The two weeks that he spent at home seemed to drag on, even though he was constantly surrounded by people he loved. They were doing their best to cheer him up and keep him busy, but Killian was just plain heartbroken, and no matter how hard everyone tried, it just didn’t seem to work. Killian did his best to not stay in the house when Ruby’s friends came over, especially Emma, because he couldn’t face her. He also felt guilty for what he had done to her by lying for 3 years and then bombarding her with constant texts and phone calls. He now understood how she felt, because he felt the same way every time his phone beeped with a text from Milah. He just couldn’t face her or what she wanted to say to him. So now he knew that he couldn’t rush trying to get his relationship with Emma back on track; she would have to come to him when she was ready to forgive him.

 

* * *

David and Mary Margaret convinced Killian to come to their Fourth of July barbeque, so that he could be with his friends one last time before he left, so he finished his packing the day before and then went on a long run. When he got back home, no one was around, which he had expected. He headed up to his room to grab a towel before going to shower, but Killian saw something on his bed that made him pause. Killian turned the lights on, and saw a folded piece of paper with his name scrawled on it and a rolled up paper tied with a red ribbon. Killian picked up the paper with his name on it and began reading.

_Hi Killian,_

_Ruby told me what happened with Milah, and I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am. You didn’t deserve what she did to you, and I hope in time you will be okay. I know I’ve been mad at you and avoiding you as much as possible, and I guess I still am mad at you for hiding the truth from me, but I think in time I will be able to forgive you. Maybe we can try to be friends and talk a bit._

_I know you’re leaving for the Navy soon, but I wanted to give this to you. I made it for you the day you left. I’ve kept it all this time. And now you’re leaving again, so I guess I want you to have it. This is my first step at trying to understand and forgive you._

_I’ll see you at Mary Margaret’s tomorrow, maybe we can talk._

_Emma_

Killian was shocked. Emma was willing to forgive him in time. But what did she mean that she had made him something the day he left? Killian turned to the rolled paper and slid off the ribbon. He couldn’t believe what he saw: it was a hand drawing of him and Emma when they were kids back in the foster centre. She must have made this the day he left to join the Jones’ family. Slowly, a small smile started to spread across his face, and for the first time in weeks, he looked forward to something, which made him very happy indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> Sorry if there are any errors in how getting into the Navy works. I was going a bit off of how the Canadian Armed Forces is and what I could find off the net. Also, I am pretty sure that you are not actually allowed to pick where you get stationed after completing training, at least that is the case up in Canada, but I changed that small fact for plot purposes.
> 
> Please leave a comment!  
> ~KCJ


	12. Sibling Bonding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, I had this written last week, but I kept forgetting to post it as I started a new job last week, and got busy with that.
> 
> For those of you looking forward to the BBQ, especially Jen, you'll have to wait at least one more. Sorry! Also, I'm glad Emma kept the picture all this time as well, and was finally able to give it to Killian!
> 
> Supermandatada - here is another chapter for you to read. I'm glad you caught the parallels between Killian/Emma and Killian/Milah - I was really hoping I got it out right.
> 
> Enjoy this chapter everyone!

Killian woke the next morning, bright and early. For the first time in weeks he was actually looking forward to something. He was still heartbroken and extremely mad at Milah for what she put him through, especially considering that he thought people who cheated were cowards. If they were unhappy in a relationship, why couldn’t they have the decency and the respect of their significant other to tell them the problem; not go behind their back and be with someone else? And that was exactly what Milah did to him. She had never once indicated that she was unhappy or felt lonely in their relationship. Killian also couldn’t get over the fact of how she had been when meeting his family, less than 2 months prior. The way she interacted made it seem like she was thinking of their future together, and was happy.

Killian pushed all thoughts of Milah out of his mind. He woke up feeling happy, and he wanted to stay feeling happy, in order to be in a good mood for his last day with his friends before heading out. The fact that Emma, his Rugrat, had reached out to him made him feel free. He couldn’t wait to see her later in the day. So, Killian rolled out of bed, got ready and went for a run. Killian basked in the warmth of the early morning sun and the gentle breeze that seemed to cleanse him from within. It was an hour and a half before he returned home. He could hear his family shuffling around upstairs, so he ran up for a quick shower and headed to the kitchen to whip up some chocolate chip pancakes for himself and Ruby.

“Someone’s in a good mood! I smell my favourite!” Ruby bound into the kitchen and came to stand next to Killian at the stove. She stole a piece from a finished pancake and moaned in delight.

“Can you set the table Rubs?”

“Only if you tell me what happened. Please. I love that you’re happy today and I want to know who did it.” Ruby gave Killian her trademark puppy dog face, before turning around to the cupboard and collecting dishes.

“Well, I just wanted to spend my last day enjoying with everyone. I know I’ve been a bit of a downer lately…”

“No one blames you for that Killian. We all want you to be happy, but we want you to take your time.”

“I know. And I’m grateful I have all of you here for me. I’m still really hurt by what happened. I never in a million years imagined Milah would do something like that to me. I really thought we were happy. But I don’t want to think about her today. I’m actually happy today Ruby, and it’s all because of Emma.” Killian gave Ruby a big smile, one that she hadn’t seen on his face in a long time.

“Emma, eh?… She didn’t tell me that you guys talked yesterday. And we were together. Sneaky girl.”

“Maybe she didn’t tell you anything, because we didn’t actually talk.”

“So then, what did Emma do to make you happy?”

“Well, I found a special something on my bed last night when I came home. A picture…”

“OH MY GOD!!!! She gave you her drawing!!! That is soo amazing. She showed it to me after we came back from New York. She really sucks at drawing though, even for her 3-year old self. But it’s totally cute isn’t it. Stick figure Killian is totally adorable.” Ruby started laughing, with Killian joining in.

“I can’t believe that she kept that silly drawing all this time. 15 years! That’s how long she’s waited to give it to me. She wrote me a note too, telling me about the drawing and that she was ready to try being friends again.”

“Oh that’s great news Killian. I’m really happy that things are starting to look up with Emma.”

“Me too Ruby. So that’s why I’m in a good mood today. And I’ll try talking to her at the BBQ later today, so we’ll see how things go.”

“Well, I’m glad for you. I just wish you weren’t leaving tomorrow. I haven’t gotten to spend a lot of time with you these past few years, and now you’re leaving again for months.” Ruby quickly became somber, remembering that this was her brother’s last day in town.

“Oh Ruby,” Killian pulled Ruby into his arms for a hug, “I’ll be back in no time. And we’ll talk whenever possible. Now I was thinking we could spend the morning together, just you and me. We can go for a quick sail and stop by to see Liam before heading to the BBQ.”

“Ya, Killian, that sounds great! I love you!”

“Love you to Ruby. Now let’s eat my amazing pancakes before they get any colder.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed a bit of sibling bonding! :)
> 
> Thanks for all your continued reading and support. Means a lot to me!
> 
> ~KCJ


	13. The BBQ - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Here is the BBQ chapter.

After a wonderful morning spent sailing on the Mystic River, Killian and Ruby stopped off at the Charlestown Navy Yard to pick up Liam before heading home. The three quickly got changed, grabbed their contributions of drinks and sides from the fridge, and headed over to the Nolan house.

Killian didn’t bother with ringing the doorbell, he just tried the door knob, which happened to be unlocked, and walked into the house.

“The Jones clan has finally arrived. This 4 th  of July party can now officially start!” Killian yelled as he walked straight back to the kitchen, with Liam and Ruby following. The three placed their items on the table and Killian turned to Mary Margaret.

“Hey M&M! Happy 4 th  of July!”

“Hi Killian, it’s good to see you.” She enveloped Killian into a hug and whispered, “How are you doing?”

“I’m ok. Today is a good day!”

“I’m glad, I was really worried about you.”

“Hey Killian,” David called out from behind him, slapping Killian on the back. “Glad you’re here. You can take James for a bit, I think he misses his uncle.” David unceremoniously dropped 2-year old James into Killian’s waiting arms, and headed towards the back door. “Oh by the way Killian, I think your nephew needs a diaper change. You don’t mind, do you!”

“Oh bloody hell! No way, mate. You better get back in here and do this for me. You know I hate changing diapers.” Killian shouted back at David; who was already outside and laughing maniacally.

“Oh Killian, don’t be an arse. Go and change the kid, so we can all enjoy the day.”

“Easy for you to say Liam, you’re not the one who needs to do it.” Killian huffed. He slowly turned and glared at Liam, Ruby, Mary Margaret, and Graham, who had just come in, as they all laughed at his expense. “Fine, I’ll do it this time, but next diaper change is on you Liam.”

With that, Killian turned and walked back the way he came, heading for the stairs to go up to the nursery. “All right, Jimbo. Let’s get this dirty diaper off of you, and get you all nice and cleaned up. You want to go and play outside right.” Killian couldn’t help but cuddle the little boy to his chest. James just laughed and began talking to Killian in little stinted sentences.

“Hey David, I’m just putting something in your room… Oh you’re not David. Hi Killian, sorry I thought David was in here.”

Killian quickly turned around, to see Emma standing just outside of James’ door. Suddenly, Killian’s mind was completely blank, and he didn’t know what to say.

“Ummm, Killian? Are you ok?” Emma gave Killian a quizzical look, arching her eyebrows in concern.

Killian quickly shook his head to clear it. “Hi Emma, sorry. I just got lost in thought.”

“It’s fine. How are you doing?” Emma asked, stepping into the room and coming to James to give him a quick kiss on the cheek, as Killian turned back around to finish changing the diaper.

“I’m doing much better since last night Emma. I got your gift. Thank you so much for giving it to me. It really means a lot. It made me feel better than I have felt these past couple of weeks. Though I still can’t understand why Milah did what she did. I don’t know why she never told me that she was feeling unhappy in our relationship.”

“I’m sorry Killian. All I can say is that you didn’t deserve that.”

“Thanks, Emma. And I am so very sorry, for not telling you who I was as soon as I recognized you. I just didn’t know how to proceed that day when I first saw you, and then I was back off to university, and it never felt like the right time to tell you. Plus I was scared of your reaction, when you found out that I had a good life and you didn’t.” Killian looked up at Emma from underneath his lashes.

Emma glanced back at Killian. “It still hurts though, Killian. I get that you think you were doing the right thing, but I don’t understand  _how_ you  _thought_  it  _was_  the right thing. You didn’t know for sure how I would react. I would have been happy for you, that at least the person who looked out for me as a baby had a good life, and didn’t want me to ever forget them. It’s not your fault that I didn’t get that until much later. But, you hid the truth from me. I know it’s a totally different situation, but how is your hiding who you were from me any different than Milah hiding how she felt from you?”

By then, Killian had finished changing James’ diaper and lifted the little boy back into his arms.

“You don’t really think that, do you Emma? Milah and I… We were in a relationship for 3 years. I lived with her for the 3 months between finishing exams and catching her in bed with her boss. I know you told me in your letter that Ruby told you what happened with Milah. But did she tell you that I caught my girlfriend cheating on me in our bed the night I was going to ask her to be my wife and spend the rest of our lives together?”

Killian’s voice was steadily rising, and James started becoming agitated at the increase in tension. He took a moment to pause, and placed James on the floor, who immediately began playing with his toys. Upon standing upright again, he kept his back to Emma, and tried to calm himself down.

“No, Killian, I didn’t know that. Ruby only told me that you caught Milah cheating when you went back home. I didn’t know that you were going to propose.”

“Well then. You are right that it’s a totally different situation, because you and I had not had any sort of relationship for over 10 years. So yes, I did think it was the right thing to do by not telling you who I was. It made no difference to either of us going forward, and it wouldn’t change anything about how we thought of our pasts. But for me to be mad at Milah for her hiding how she felt, and then learning about it because I caught her in bed with another man. That is completely different. And I have every right to be mad at Milah for what happened. Hell, for all I know, if I hadn’t gone back to New York early, I would still be with Milah, and she would be cheating on me behind my back. It doesn’t matter that that night was the first time – she may have continued and I would be planning my wedding to someone who cheats on me?” Killian had turned back around to face Emma during his little tirade, and he knew that what he was saying was affecting her, but he couldn’t help himself. Emma had no right to compare their situation with his and Milah’s.

“The only thing that I acknowledge as being the same is the fact that I didn’t give you time to digest what happened after you found out. I kept trying to get a hold of you and try to get you to see my reasoning, when I should have just given you time. And I only realized that after Milah was doing the same thing with me, trying to apologize and get me to understand, when all I wanted was to be left alone. That’s why these past few weeks I haven’t so much as texted you. But don’t you dare think that my not telling you is in any way similar to Milah not telling me.”

With that, Killian fell silent, not having anything else left to say. He turned back to James and began playing with him. Emma was just standing there, staring at Killian, with unshed tears in her eyes.

“Killian, is everything all right up here? Is James ok? I heard shouting.” Killian and Emma heard Mary Margaret call out as she entered her son’s bedroom. “What is going on?” Mary Margaret looked back and forth between Killian and Emma, with concern etched upon her face.

“Everything’s fine M&M. Just talking and playing with the wee lad.” Killian plastered his well-known grin on his face, handed little James his toy back and swept out of the room without so much as a glance at Emma.

_Well, there goes this nice day, right down the sewer drain. So much for thinking that my last day at home would be enjoyable. And that hanging out with Emma would be a nice distraction from all the hell._  Killian couldn’t believe that he was so naive to think that he would hope to have just one good day. As he walked back down the stairs, he contemplated just leaving and going back home, but ultimately decided against it. He had promised his sister that he would spend the day with his friends, and he was strong enough to ignore what happened with Emma and enjoy the party that had barely even begun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's not as happy as most of you expected - but don't worry, the BBQ is not over yet.
> 
> Thanks so much for reading!
> 
> ~KCJ


	14. The BBQ - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! You guys will not believe where I was this weekend... Very coincidentally I ended up going to New Brunswick, New Jersey for my husband's cousin's wedding. And sooo, I made him drive us by Rutgers University before we headed back home (Ottawa, Canada), because how could I not even take a look at the university that I randomly picked and decided to send Killian to? And at the time I wrote that part of the story, I had no idea about this wedding, and even when I did find out about the wedding I didn't clue into the location until we actually got there on Fri night.
> 
> Anyways, here is the 2nd part of the BBQ. Jen, thanks for your comment last chapter, and I totally agree with you on Killian's behaviour, but I couldn't have everything be easy peasy for Killian and Emma. But I hope this chapter makes up for the last one.
> 
> Enjoy!

Killian walked through the kitchen and headed out to the backyard. He grabbed a beer from the cooler and walked over to David, who had started up the BBQ.

“Where’s James?”

“He’s with Mary Margaret.” David gave Killian a long hard look after he heard the short, clipped response from Killian.

“You ok Killian, you seem a bit tense.”

“Yah I’m fine Dave. Let’s get this BBQ going.”

“Yo Killian, you up for some ball?” Killian turned as he heard Neal shout out to him.

“Sure thing, buddy. Give it a go.”

Killian and Neal began throwing the football around, and soon enough Liam, Graham and David joined in, and they had a quick pick-up game of 3 on 2, Killian and David against Liam, Neal and Graham. Ruby, who had gone back inside, came out a little while later carrying James, with Emma and Mary Margaret behind her.

“Are we ready to eat boys?” Mary Margaret called out, effectively stopping the game. Ruby headed over to Killian and gave him a quick smile before whispering, “Emma wants to talk to you.”

“I’m not really in the mood for more condescension Ruby. Tell her I just want to pretend our earlier conversation didn’t happen, so I can enjoy my afternoon with my friends. Otherwise I’m leaving early and going to a bar.”

“But Killian,”

“Ruby, just stop. I know you want us to all be merry, but I really am not in the mood right now.”

“Ok Killian. If that’s what you want. But you should know that you’re totally being a jerk right now and Emma totally deserves being treated better than how you are treating her currently, especially if she means as much to you as you say she does. And you’re totally ruining your last day here, because you don’t know how to handle your feelings.” With that, Ruby turned her back on Killian and walked back over to Emma. Killian noticed the slight fall in Emma’s features indicating she was hurt and disappointed that he didn’t want to talk to her, but at this point he didn’t seem to care. Killian didn’t need Emma to have fun; he had been having it a short 5 minutes prior when he was playing ball with the boys. So he walked over to the BBQ and helped David finish up before the two of them went over to the table and grabbed food. David took a hold of James and set him down on a blanket on the ground with Killian, Liam, and Mary Margaret joining him.

Ruby, Graham, Emma and Neal were hanging out on the deck surrounding the pool and laughing could be heard every once in a while from the youngsters, however slightly less from Emma than the other three. Killian glanced at Emma a few times, and caught her staring back at him with an inquisitive gaze on her face, but he was quick to look away. He also noticed Mary Margaret giving him concerned looks every once in a while, but she didn’t bring anything up, which in and of itself was quite unusual. Although Killian took part in the conversation with his friends and brother, he also kept considering Ruby’s words and replayed his conversation with Emma in his head. Realising that he perhaps did overreact, Killian began feeling bad about yelling at Emma, so when he saw Emma get up to take her plate into the kitchen, he followed her inside.

“Hi Emma,” he quietly said as he entered.

She turned around from the sink and acknowledged him with a small tilt of her head and a raised eyebrow.

“Ruby told me earlier that you wanted to talk to me.”

“Yes, and you told her that you didn’t want to endure my patronising you, and to let you pretend we didn’t talk earlier.” Emma turned back to the sink and continued washing the dishes.

There was silence for a minute, only the sound of water splashing. “Well I was wrong. I thought about our conversation earlier, and I had no right to start yelling at you.” Emma continued washing the dishes, so Killian spoke to her back. The only indication that Emma was listening to what Killian was saying, was the slight change in her posture, a softening of her shoulders from the raised ones that has happened when he initially came into the kitchen.

“Just because I’ve been miserable and feeling so hurt by what happened to me, doesn’t mean that I have any right to take it out on you. Especially when you have your own reasons for being upset with me, but yet you still cared enough to give me something to make me feel better. And for that I’m really grateful Emma. I know I told you this before I started yelling at you, but receiving that drawing did make me feel better than I have in weeks. I know you didn’t need to give it to me, considering I hid our prior relationship for 3 years, but I’m glad that you did.”

“Killian, I get that you’re really upset about what Milah did, but you _did_ hurt me. And you’re right, you had no right to yell at me earlier, especially since all I did was ask you a simple question based on how I was feeling. I know that your omission isn’t the same as Milah’s lies, but you have to understand that you did hide something from me, the way she hid something from you. In the end, hers had a greater consequence than yours, but I have a right to feel upset. You hid something from me for three years, Killian. That’s a long time. And you only hid it because you were scared I would blame you for leaving me all alone. Though I don’t condone what Milah did, you found out right away about her indiscretion. Yes you might be questioning your entire relationship now and her feelings for you, but eventually you’ll need to talk to her as well. It’ll take time for you to do that, but when I found out that you were hurting, that is what ultimately made me realise that I needed to give you a chance to explain yourself to me.”

Emma had finished washing the dishes and had turned around to face Killian while she was speaking. Killian couldn’t believe how mature, calm and controlled Emma sounded. Killian could just stare at her in awe, and listened quietly to what she was saying. It took him a good 30 seconds before he realised that she had stopped speaking and was waiting for him to say something in return.

“Emma… Emma, you’re absolutely right. I was being a complete jerk to you earlier, and I guess for the last three years. I should have told you right away when I realised our history together. I didn’t consider your feelings at all. I don’t know how I’ll make it up to you Emma, but I hope you’ll let me try and I hope we can become friends again.” Killian looked up at Emma through his eyelashes, with a hopeful expression on his face.

“I’d like that Killian. You meant a lot to me when I was little. You’re the only person I have memories of from that time. But I think I still need to take it slow, you can’t expect me to completely forgive you yet.”

“I don’t Emma. I just want a chance.”

Before Emma could respond, there was a soft cough from behind Killian.

“Sorry to interrupt. But I see that you two have finally made up.” Mary Margaret had entered the kitchen with a bright smile on her face. “Ruby and I made sure none of the boys bothered you, but they were getting antsy for the dessert, so I figured I’d come in and see how you were faring. But it seems like you have talked everything out.”

“Hi, Mary Margaret. Thanks. Yes we had a chance to talk, and I think we’re doing ok. Right, Emma?”

“Ya, we’re good Killian.”

“Oh that’s wonderful! Now you guys need to hug it out and then come back outside.”

Killian and Emma looked at Mary Margaret like she had a second head on her neck, “why do we need to do that M&M?”

“Emma, honey. You guys were yelling at each other earlier, and now you’ve made up. But you fully make up with someone important in your life only if you embrace each other. So listen to your older sister…” Mary Margaret then turned to look at Killian and placed her hands on her hips, “and your closest friend, and give each other a hug. I am not leaving until you do.”

Killian gave Mary Margaret a small smile and walked over to Emma holding his arms open for her to make the final steps into his waiting arms. When she did wrap her arms around his waist, he gave her a tight squeeze and softly kissed the top of her head. “I’m glad we got to work things out Emma. And again I’m really very sorry for how I behaved earlier. It was really bad form and ungentlemanly. Thank you for being so mature about it. When did you grow up Rugrat?”

“Very funny Killi! I was always mature for my age. And it’s ok. I’m sorry as well.”

With that Emma stepped out from Killian’s arms and helped Mary Margaret grab the dessert. She walked in front of Killian, giving him a chance to give Mary Margaret a small hug and kiss to the cheek thanking her for sticking her nose into his business.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading everyone! And thanks for being so patient with the super slow updates!
> 
> ~KCJ


	15. BBQ - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, finally a new chapter for you lovely and patient readers. I got a bit distracted with starting to write 2 other stories, so I apologize.  
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter.

After having talked to Emma and essentially clearing the air between them, Killian started to enjoy his afternoon much more than earlier. He was starting to laugh more with his friends and they could tell that he seemed much lighter as well.

When Emma, Ruby, Neal and Graham entered the pool and started splashing each other, Killian couldn’t help but smile as he watched them, especially Emma. He kept thinking how even though she ended up having a rough childhood, she was finally able to be happy and with friends and family that loved her. Although it was close to 10 years after his adoption, he was glad that the Blanchard's found her and gave her a steady home. But thinking of that didn't help matters when it also brought back thoughts of his parents. He took a look over at Emma again, glancing at her neck to look at the Swan necklace before he remembered that he actually had it. He wondered if she ever thought about it or missed the familiar weight of it around her neck. He knew that she had never taken it off for years. Or did she not even care about it anymore? Killian hoped that one day he would be able to give it back to her and that she would wear it again.

"Killian, come in the water." Ruby yelled at him, breaking him from his thoughts. "It's amazing."

"Nah, I'm ok Ruby."

"You should go in Killian. This will be your last chance to enjoy the pool for a while. You might as well have some fun. And you keep staring at Emma, so why don't you just go and have fun with them." Mary Margaret was giving Killian a knowing look with a small smile on her face. She then pushed little James into his arms, "Here take James with you. He loves the water and it'll give you an excuse to go in."

Liam and David couldn't help but start teasing Killian after hearing Mary Margaret's words about him wanting to spend some time with Emma.

"Killian, we understand. This is the first time in a long time that you've been able to spend time with the girl who was like your baby sister all those years ago. And you've barely paid us any attention all day. We know you had a fight with her earlier and now you guys are back on track, or at least attempting to be. Just go over there and enjoy some time with her."

"Thanks, Liam. I guess I will go over. Come on James, do you want to go for a little swim?" Killian stood up and hand-in-hand with James they walked over to the pool. James was becoming more and more excited the closer they got, and attempted to peel his little t-shirt up over his head. “Whoa, there buddy, slow down a bit, yeah. Let me help you with that and then we’ll be right and ready for a little swim ok.” Killian helped get James’ floaters on his arms and then took his own clothes off, thankful that he was wearing his trunks underneath. Being so busy with James, he didn’t notice the small look that Emma had on her face at seeing him half naked, or that she quickly turned her head away from him when he looked back up at the group in the water.

“So James, who do you want to catch you when you get thrown in, little man?”

“Unkie Graham!!!” the little boy squealed in laughter as Killian scooped him up and swung him gently by his arms. Graham swam over to the shallow end of the pool and indicated he was ready for his newly assigned position, as James’ catcher.

“Ok James, are you ready? 1, 2, 3 and away we go,” Killian gently tossed the laughing boy right into Graham’s waiting arms, landing with a big splash. As soon as he saw that James was all right, Killian jumped into the pool after him and began chasing the boy as Graham swam him away. Soon enough, Ruby, Emma and Neal joined in on a game of tag, everyone laughing and squealing along with little James.

Liam, David and Mary Margaret watched the excitement with looks of amusement on their faces. "He’ll be ok Liam. Milah may have hurt him very badly, but I have a feeling that Emma will end up bringing him back to his old self.” Mary Margaret gave the 2 men beside her an assuring nod of the head and then turned back to watch her best friend play with her son, brother and sister.

“I know he will, Mary Margaret. I never had any doubt that he would find happiness again. I’m just glad that he was able to get a bit of joy back before he left for training. Otherwise he would have been focusing all his energy with negative thoughts. Now I know that he will be concentrating on the tasks at hand and doing a good job.”

The afternoon passed by fairly quickly after that, everyone having fun in the water, especially after Liam, David and Mary Margaret joined in, after getting James washed up and put to bed for an afternoon nap. There was a quick game of Marco Polo, in which on occasion Killian brushed up against Emma or vice versa, and both would be extremely quick at apologising to each other, still a tad wary of one another. Killian couldn’t help the thoughts that entered his mind at seeing Emma in her bikini or every time he touched her. She was definitely beautiful and had a gorgeous body, and the continuous laughter and smile on her face made him feel extremely happy. He realised that with Emma back in his life, he would be able to get over Milah and the hurt that she had put him through.

Once the group was watered out, and it was time to start thinking about dinner, everyone took turns going inside to shower and change. They all then pitched in to prepare the meal for dinner and by 8 o’clock, everyone was exhausted, getting ready to go home.

As no one would be seeing Killian again for about the next 6 months, there was a lot of hugging going on. Mary Margaret even started crying and told Killian that he had to call or write at least every other day, at least to one person, so they would know he was doing ok.

“Good luck out there, Killian,” Neal came up behind him and gave him a quick punch in the shoulder. “Show ‘em all how Storybrookers do things.”

“Thanks Neal, I definitely will.” Killian then turned to Emma. “Bye Emma.”

“Bye Killian. Good luck. I’ll see you when you get back.” She stepped closer to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him in for a completely unexpected hug. “I’ll miss you, Emma. I’m really glad we made up. If we hadn’t, it would have bothered me the entire time I would be away.” He whispered so only she could hear.

“We’re good Killi. Now go and become a Naval Officer.”

With one last squeeze, Killian let go of Emma, threw a final goodbye at David and Mary Margaret and walked out to the car where Liam and Ruby were waiting for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. After 2 chapters of BBQ angst, I wanted at least 1 BBQ chapter where there was some fun.  
> Please leave me a comment, as I really appreciate them, and they give me a lot of motivation to continue writing this.  
> Thanks,  
> ~KCJ


	16. Training

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, here is a new chapter for you all, sorry for it being over a month since my last post. I got distracted with writing my other fic (I'm Over You), and life.  
> Also, be forewarned – I have no knowledge whatsoever on how the US Navy works and exact processes on training. I can’t even base it on the Canadian Forces (because I only know about the application process here and nothing further than that). I will try not to go into any detail, but even if I do mention something about Killian’s time in training, and it is completely wrong, please don’t judge, but if you know the real thing, I would love for you to tell me. So if anything is remotely wrong, which I’m sure there will be, I’m sorry. Also, some things I did specifically for purposes of the plot.  
> Thanks, and hope you enjoy.

Killian left for the airport early the next morning in order to catch his flight to Chicago, saying goodbye to his parents and Ruby. Liam had decided to drive him in order to give him some last minute advice.

“Keep your head up, follow orders. Don’t be a smart ass. You’ll be pushed really hard.”

“I’ll be fine Liam. I’ve been through crazy college football training. I’m in great shape. I’m in better shape than you were when you joined.”

“This is different than football training. Sure it’ll help in some strength and running drills, but there’s a lot more than that. You have to put your all in these next 8 weeks. Just because you will end up going into a specialization later on, doesn’t mean you get any leniency. Everyone goes through the same physical training, whether they end up using it or not. And you have to pass this part, in order to get to Officer Candidate School.”

“Liam I already know all of this. I do remember when you went for your training. And I’ve been to all of the info and prep sessions.” They had reached the airport by then, so Killian grabbed his bag from the trunk, hoisting it up onto his shoulder.

“Ok then. Well, I know you’ll do great. You probably won’t be able to call every night, but message me with how you’re doing when you get the chance. Good look little brother, and make sure you live up to the Jones name.”

“Ahhh, it’s younger brother, Liam. Thanks. I’ll do you proud.” Liam pulled Killian into a big hug and sent him off into the airport.

“Ok Killian, this is the start of a new chapter. Time to forget about everything that’s happened, and focus on your future.” Killian told himself as he walked to the check-in counter.

A little over 3 hours later, Killian landed at O’Hare International Airport. There was someone waiting for him, and as he was driven to the Naval training facility, north of Chicago, he took the time to re-acquaint himself with the city. It had been a while since the family had taken a trip up to Chicago.

That night, after a pretty hectic first day of introductions, information, rules and regulations, and an initial training exercise, Killian dropped onto his bunk and sent his family a couple of quick texts letting them know he had arrived safely and that the first day had gone well. He also sent a quick text to Mary Margaret and David, letting them know the same.

The weeks went by quickly. Killian was having an amazing experience, and he was very much so in his element, although he did have to admit that his body had never been sorer in his life. Even the numerous tackles during his football games seemed like a cakewalk to what his body was going through during Boot Camp. The Virtual Environments for Ship and Shore Experimental Learning, commonly known as VESSEL, was one of Killian’s favourite exercises. Not only was the video-game-based casualty responding system fun, but he was proving to be one of the best in his class. He enjoyed the fact that it combined role-playing with education and real-time strategy.

Killian’s joys weren’t just from training and exercises though. He was naturally a friendly person, with loads of charisma oozing out of him, and so it was easy for him to make friends with his Boot Camp mates. He specifically bonded with 3 other engineering graduates, Will Scarlet, Robin Locksley and William Smee. They would be joining him in Rhode Island for Officer Candidate School and most probably would also be stationed in Boston with him at the end of it all. The four of them spent all of their off time together, heading into the City to buy the supplies and groceries for the base and occasionally to grab a beer on a night off. He had even met one of Liam’s training officers who told him that he expected the same grit and determination from the younger Jones brother as he had seen from the older.

Killian was doing his best to stay in touch with his family, especially Liam, letting him know how things were going, and Ruby was keeping him updated on all the latest gossip, including how everyone was getting ready to start their freshman year at college/university. Both she and Emma were going to be joining Graham at Boston University; however Neal would be going to Florida State for football, much to Emma’s disappointment. Ruby let it slip that though Emma had known about it for months, since acceptance letters had come in, she was still hoping that Neal would make a last minute switch and stay closer to home like Killian did. But at the same time understanding that Neal wanted to spend some time with his father after years of being separated, since his parents had divorced. Killian hoped that Emma and Neal would be able to handle the long distance relationship.

At least once every 2 weeks, Killian also Skyped with Mary Margaret, David and James, which the young lad loved; telling his “Unkie Killi” all the wonderful things he was up to. The one person that he desperately wanted to talk to was Emma, but he knew he couldn’t push her, not with everything that had happened between the two of them. The distance between them was good. He hoped that when he went back to Boston, they would be able to resume a friendship.

Even though Killian was constantly occupied, there would be nights that Milah would invade his thoughts, and the next day Killian would have to take out his anger through an extra hard work out. But as the days kept passing, he prided himself in doing a better job in getting over the hurt and betrayal by Milah. He still received an occasional message from her, asking him how things were going, but he had yet to respond, not wanting to start something that would be too difficult to get into while he needed to concentrate. Those ended up being the nights that were the hardest for him.

Soon enough it was the end of August and boot camp was over. Killian had made it through extremely well. Those who were going to Rhode Island for Officer Candidate School would be flying out directly to Rhode Island and would begin specialized trainings within a week. Although Boston was only 2.5 hours away, Killian was unable to leave the Base and there would be no family visits until graduation from the program.

Officer Candidate School was not any easier than Boot Camp. Rather it was more difficult, more intense and required much more studying and training. The candidates were taught the intricacies of living and manning a ship and submarine, in respect to specific duties and positions. They covered a lot that would enable the new candidates to start adapting and functioning as a Navy man, with the expectation that certain fields required further continuing education and training.

* * *

_Hi Killian. How is training going?_

**Who is this?**

_It's Emma._

Were Killian’s eyes deceiving him? Did he just receive a message from Emma? But how did she even get his number?

**Emma??? How did you get my number? What are you doing messaging me?**

He was so flustered that he ended up actually texting what was running through his mind. Why oh why was he so nervous for some reason? It most definitely was not because this was probably the first form of communication that he was having with Emma in months. _No, of course not._ Killian rolled his eyes at himself, shook his head to clear his thoughts and turned his attention back to his phone.

**Sorry… I was a bit surprised that you had messaged me…**

**How are you doing Emma? How is Boston U going? Are you enjoying your classes?**

_It’s fine, Killian. Ruby gave me your number… Well she had actually given it to me months ago._

_BU is good. I’m really enjoying the classes – law, psychology mostly._

**That’s good. I’m glad you’re enjoying. Hope you’re not getting into too much trouble. ;)**

_Haha, very funny. I’m a perfect student._

**Well it’s only been a few weeks, you have time to descend into the dark side.**

_So, how was boot camp? Ruby says you’re back on the east coast now?_

**Boot camp was painful, but fun. I’m really glad I’m here. And yes, I’m in Rhode Island now, until Dec. So closer to home. It’s going well so far.**

_Oh that’s good… Glad you’re enjoying…_

_K, well I gotta go now. I have my first test tomorrow. I just wanted to say hi to you. Bye…_

**“Hi!” LOL. Thanks Emma. Good luck tomorrow, you’ll do fine.**

Killian stared at his phone for a couple of more minutes, hoping for another reply from Emma, but didn’t receive anything else. He flopped down on his bed and stared up at the ceiling.  _Emma reached out to me. Finally! Does this mean she’s forgiven me?_ He couldn’t help but be a bit confused. There ended up being no actual point to her messages. Maybe she just wanted a small break from studying and like she said, wanted to say hi. Well, if that was all he was going to get from her, he would readily accept it! And now he had her number as well, but she didn’t imply that she would talk to him again or that it was okay for him to message her…. _Oh God, why was this so damn confusing?!_ And why in the hell was he acting like a little teenager with his first crush on the cute girl, who had spoken to him for the first time? Killian was a man who had had girlfriends before, why was he acting and thinking like a bumbling idiot?

Eventually, Killian calmed his thoughts and eventually fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter... And once again sorry for the super long delay in getting this posted.  
> Please leave a comment, it really motivates me to continue writing.  
> ~KCJ


	17. Text Messages

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, here is another chapter for you all! Though it's a bit on the shorter side, I hope you enjoy it.
> 
> So, as previously mentioned, I know nothing about Navy training. I’m sure there are strict rules in terms of sleeping and what not, as well as everything else, and as ambrown1022 commented (thank you by the way for your input), phones are not even allowed! So, since I didn’t know that before writing the last chapter, I have carried on with my erroneous ways and kept the text messaging as a vital part of my plot. Though, it would have been cool to do something with hand-written letters. Oh well! *Shrugs apologetically*. Since this is not real life, everything I say can be taken with a grain of salt!
> 
> Enjoy this next chapter, though I assure you Killian is still acting like a complete idiot. :)
> 
> I also want to say thank you to all of you who have been reading and giving kudos and commenting! I really appreciate it.

_Hi. It’s Emma. U busy?_

**_Hi. Not busy, just doing some reading._ **

**_How are you?_ **

_I’m good._

_Have a psyc test tomorrow. Just taking a small break from studying._

**_Ahhh, I see._ **

_So, Killian, what is your favourite colour?_

**_Hmmm.. I guess I have to say black._ **

_You know that black is not really a colour right? It is actually the absence of colour._

_So you have to pick something else…_

**_How the hell do you know that?_ **

_We learned about it in one of my classes. It’s kinda cool, you know. It occurs because that particular object absorbs all of the light spectra and so you see something that is black, or without any colour. And white is the reflection of the light so is made up of all of the colours in visible spectrum._

**_Wow! You sure are a nerd! ;)_ **

_*eye roll* Thanks, I will take that as a compliment…._

_Now answer the question again!_

**_Hmmmm…_ **

**_Well if I can’t pick black (though I am still telling every other person who asks me that question that black is my colour), then I will pick navy blue._ **

**_Happy now?!_ **

_Yes, extremely! :)_

**_Am I correct in assuming that red is still your favourite colour, Rugrat?_ **

_Wow, how did you remember?_

**_I remember a lot of things about you from back then._ **

_Really?! Maybe one day you can tell me things that I don’t remember._

**_Of course, Rugrat!_ **

_OK. Great! Thanks Killian._

_I have to go now. My psyc text is calling my name. Byeee!_

**_Bye. Good luck tomorrow!_ **

Killian put his phone down with a large smile gracing his face. Emma had asked him to tell her more about her days as a child. He felt honoured that she had asked him that. It finally felt as though Emma was accepting him back into her life and that she wanted to be a part of it. It was a nice feeling.  

* * *

_Killiiiii…… Are you busy??? *angel face*_

**_Hi Emma! Not busy at the moment. How are you?_ **

_I have a Law test tomorrow afternoon. I’m really worried about it._

**_Well, have you studied?_ **

_Of course I’ve studied for it Killian! Jeesh, I am not a child!_

**_I never once implied that you were Rugrat! ;)_ **

_Humph!_

_And just for your information… I know my stuff very well. I’ve been reviewing the topics for the past week._

**_Then why are you worried?_ **

_Because I always worry about tests and exams._

**_Is school going ok Emma? You’re not having a hard time are you?_ **

_Classes are great Killian. I’m doing really well in them. I’ve been acing my tests and assignments. :)_

**_That’s a good girl!_ **

**_I’m glad you’re doing well in school Rugrat._ **

_Thanks Killi. Now, let’s talk about you? What have you been learning? Any amusing stories to tell me?_

**_Well my mates are bloody hilarious! We’ve been pulling pranks on some of our other friends…_ **

Killian went on to describe some of his daily routine to Emma and before he knew they had been chatting for more than half an hour. It still wasn’t too late, but Emma soon stopped the conversation, telling him that she wanted to go have a small snack before reading for a bit and then going to bed. He wished her luck on her test tomorrow and then scanned his conversation with her. It was a little strange that she had messaged him for the third time the night before a test, wasn’t it? He decided that he needed Ruby’s opinion on the matter, so quickly sent her a message.

**_Ruby, I just got off the phone after another messaging conversation with Emma. She has another test tomorrow. Is she doing ok at school? She told me she is.. Can you check in on her please?_ **

Killian didn’t receive a reply back from his sister for almost an hour, and by that time he was almost ready to go to bed.

_Hmmmm…. This is the 3 rd time right?_

**_Yes, each time has been the night before a test._ **

_Very, very in-ter-es-ting!!! :0_

**_What the hell is that supposed to mean, Ruby?!_ **

_Welll……_

**_Ruby……_ **

_Ok fine._

_It’s just, as long as I’ve known her, she gets super anxious the night before a test, even when she knows her shit like the back of her hand._

**_Ok. What’s the problem? That’s totally normal._ **

_I know it’s normal you fool!_

_She just likes to talk to someone after studying, before she goes to bed to calm her mind down. It used to be me, and then it was Neal._

OH! Well then! That was very, very in-ter-es-ting! Just as Ruby said.

**_So why is it me now?_ **

_Because I know what’s going on in that pretty blonde head of hers?! Gees Killian! I dunno. Maybe Neal has been busy with school and football or something._

**_Well then, why not you? You are her best friend. And you go to the same school as her and live in the same city as her._ **

_Killian!!!! I don’t know! Stop obsessing! But I will talk to her. *eye roll*_

**_Thanks Rubes! Love you._ **

_I love you to my dorky yet adorably stupid brother! *wink*_

Man, Killian really didn’t know what to think. Sure there were lots of reasons why Emma could be messaging him. But they just didn’t make any sense. As far as he knew, and from what Ruby had told him, Emma was still in a solid relationship with her boyfriend, one Neal Cassidy. So there was absolutely no reason for her to start messaging him instead of her boyfriend. Unless, Ruby was right, and Neal was just a bit busy. He doubted that Emma was messaging him the night before all of her tests. Tonight was the third time in the last month. He was sure that was the case. But until Ruby let him know that everything was A-ok with Emma, he was going to be worried.

Ruby let him know a few days later that things were a little stressful for Emma, and that she wasn’t handling the long-distance relationship that well. But it was as she had said; Neal had been busy the few times that Emma had messaged him the night before her tests, that was all. Everything else was fine. Killian didn’t know if he really believed what Ruby told him, but he couldn’t put too much thought into it, as he was having a very busy week at Candidate School?. He figured if it was anything serious then Emma would come out and tell him herself or Mary Margaret would let him know if anything happened. And from the conversations that Killian had with Emma’s sister, she had the same thoughts that Ruby did, and just told him to be there for Emma if she needed him to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> ~KCJ


	18. Surprises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, here is another chapter for you all! I was originally supposed to have Killian done his training and be back in Boston by this chapter, but the previous chapter and this one both got away from me, so his return has been postponed. Hopefully by ch 20 now. I have a few more ideas for the next chapter.
> 
> Anyways, enjoy!

Normally Killian was fast asleep by now, but tonight he had to wait a bit. He had an important task that needed to be done. Tomorrow was October 23rd. So when he finally saw his clock change from 11:59 to 12:00 he grabbed his cell off his desk and sent out a message.

**_Happy 18th birthday Rugrat!!! I hope you have a wonderful day!_ **

With the message sent, he turned off the light and was asleep in an instant.

The next day was busy and tiring as usual. When he finally got to his room later in the evening, he saw that there were a few messages waiting for him.

He opened the string from Emma and saw a simple message from her sent in the morning, thanking him for the birthday wishes. But when he scrolled to the newest message that had come in earlier in the evening, a large grin graced his cheeks at what he saw. Emma had sent him a picture of herself. She was laughing and holding up a small cupcake with a blown out star shaped candle standing in his kitchen. The caption on the picture said, " _Mmmm, my favourite! Thank you for the surprise! "_

Killian looked a bit closer at the picture and noticed something hanging from Emma’s neck, so he zoomed in and was surprised to see the swan keychain necklace there. When did she take that back? He hadn't given it back to her since the day she had pulled it from her neck and thrust it into his hand, though not for lack of trying. He shook his head in confusion, and quickly exited the photo app and went to Ruby’s string of messages.

_Hi. I did just as you asked. I bought Emma a dark chocolate and cinnamon cupcake and stuck a candle on it._

_When I told her it was from you, she was really surprised. And then asked me if she could have her swan keychain back._

_So hope you don't mind, but I had to go digging through your drawers._

Killian was overwhelmed. He let out a shaky breath. Emma had asked for the keychain back. He never thought she would. He sent a quick message to his sister.

**_Thanks Ruby! I owe you big time._ **

Then he went back to the picture of Emma. She looked really happy. Her cheeks were flushed and her green eyes were sparkling. Her entire face lit up with her beautiful smile. And Killian was the reason for it being on her face.

**_You're welcome Rugrat!_ **

**_I hope you enjoyed your day!_ **

Not even five minutes later, and his phone beeped indicating a new message.

_My day was really good Killian! The surprise at the end of the day though, when I dropped Ruby home was the highlight! :)_

_I hope you don’t mind, but I asked Ruby for the swan keychain back._

**_Of course I don't mind. It belongs to you. You didn’t even need to ask._ **

**_And I'm glad I could make your day a bit more special!_ **

_So I am curious about 1 thing, though..._

**_Yes?_ **

_How did you know that dark chocolate and cinnamon with cream cheese frosting is my favourite?_

**_Honestly, I wasn't sure if it still was. And Ruby never mentioned anything when I told her what to get you._ **

_What do you mean you weren't sure if it still was?_

**_Well, back for your 3rd birthday I convinced Cathy to buy you a cupcake on my behalf. And we ended up picking dark chocolate and cinnamon with cream cheese frosting. We put a star shaped candle on top and made you blow it out. You really loved it and asked if we could do this every year for your birthday._ **

There was no response from Emma for a couple of minutes. Killian didn't know what to think of her silence.

**_Emma..._ **

**_Are you still there?_ **

_Yah Killian, I'm still here. Just surprised and thinking._

_I didn't remember that. How did you remember?_

**_Well, like I've told you before, there are a lot of things I remember from back then. And your 3rd birthday is just one of them._ **

_Hmmmm...._

_It's nice to know someone from when I was little._

_Killian?_

**_Yes Emma?_ **

_Do you any pictures of me from when I was a baby? I don't have very many._

Reading that statement, Killian’s heart broke a bit.

**_I think I have a few pictures from back then. I have no idea where they could be, so I can't get Ruby to look for them._ **

**_Are you ok with waiting a couple of more months, until I come back to Boston?_ **

_Of course, Killian. Thank you._

_I think I'm gonna go now. M &M will be here soon, she and James are going to sleep over tonight so we can do a movie marathon. _

**_Ok. Have fun. Give James a kiss for me please and tell your sister I say hi._ **

_K. And thx again for the nice surprise today!_

With that, his conversation with Emma was over. Killian was extremely happy that he could give Emma some memories, but his heart ached for the tough life she had. He still needed to find out more about her hardships, and he wanted to take the pain of being alone for so long away. He knew that the last 4 years were the best she had ever had, but he could see that she still didn't let people in very easily. She had a lot of pain hidden deep within her. Killian decided that it would be his job to get the innocence and trust of the 3-year old Emma back to the now adult Emma.

As Killian finished his day, it occurred to him that Emma hadn't even mentioned Neal during their conversation. He figured that Neal would have been a big part of her day somehow, and that maybe she would have dropped something about him. Anyways it wasn't a big deal. Emma was happy, at least as far as he could tell from their conversation and the picture she had sent, and that was all that mattered to him.

* * *

Killian was exhausted. The day had been long and grueling, and since it was nearing winter, the temperature was getting a bit colder, making outdoor training drills harder than before. Killian just wanted to sleep, so after a quick shower he lay down in his bed and didn’t even notice that he fell asleep immediately. He suddenly woke about to the sharp shrill of his cell ringing. He groggily reached around on the bed looking for it with his eyes closed and answered the call.

“Hello” his voice was extremely rough from sleep.

“Killian?” The sound of the voice on the other end of the line had him immediately sitting up and flicking on the light.

“Emma, are you ok? What happened? Why are you calling so late?” It was a week after her birthday, and they hadn’t had the chance to message too much, so he was completely floored that she calling him.

“I’m sorry Killian… I’ll hang up… I didn’t know you would be asleep already.” Killian quickly pulled his phone away from his ear, in order to glance at the time. Realising it was only 10 pm, he rushed to let Emma know that he didn’t want her to hang up.

“No wait, it’s ok. I didn’t realise the time. I must have fallen asleep earlier. I’m ok.. Now tell me what happened? Why are you crying?”

“I’m not crying Killian. And everything is fine. Why would you think it wasn’t?”

“Emma, you don’t need to lie to me. You can tell me whatever it is that’s bothering you.”

“Seriously, Killian, nothing is wrong.” Emma could deny it all she wanted, but Killian could tell that she had been crying and was still very upset. But he didn’t want to push her if she wasn’t ready. This was the first time that she had actually called him since they had started messaging each other a month ago. So he dropped the subject and tried his best to cheer her up.

“Ok, well I’m glad you called, it’s nice hearing your voice. How are classes going?” He changed the subject, and heard Emma release a breath before she answered.

“They’re good. Midterms are almost over. I’m looking forward to Thanksgiving in a couple of weeks.”

“Oh ya, that will be fun. I’m sure M&M, Dave and James will be coming over.”

“Ya, and Eva invited your family as well. You’ll be the only one missing, I’m sorry.” This wasn’t news to Killian, his family had mentioned it to him last weekend to which he confirmed that he definitely would not be making it home.

“Why are you sorry, it’s not your fault Emma? It would have been great to spend Thanksgiving with everyone, but I’ll still be having fun here. Anyways, I’m certain you will have a wonderful holiday. You’re probably excited to see Neal, right? He hasn’t been back up since he left for Florida.”

“I won’t be seeing Neal this year for Thanksgiving. He isn’t coming to Boston.” Emma responded to Killian’s question tersely, with him noticing.

“Is everything ok, Emma?”

“Killian, it’s fine. Just drop the subject of Neal.”

“Ok, Emma. If you say so.” But he was suddenly very concerned about Emma, especially since he could hear small sniffles coming from her again. He decided he would have to talk to Ruby the next day and try to figure out what had happened. Surely, it had something to do with Neal, since she got so defensive at the mere mention of his name. He assumed they had had a fight about him not coming home for the holiday, and that had prompted Emma to actually call him for the first time, rather than just have a simple text messaging conversation.

In order to get Emma’s mind off of her fight with Neal, at least according to Killian, he spent the next hour distracting her with his plans for Hallowe’en tomorrow and Thanksgiving and what he had learned so far in Training. Soon enough, it was time to get off of the phone and so he wished Emma a goodnight.

“I’m here whenever you need to talk, Rugrat, no matter what it is.”

“Thanks, Killi. Night.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> I want to let you know that this might be the last chapter I'll be able to post for a month or so, I know you guys already had to wait a month (prior to this last week), but I will be going away and I might not have much internet access. This is one of the reason's I've tried posting 3 chapters this past week. Also, Killian and Emma kept talking in my ear and I couldn't stop their conversations ;)  
> So I will try writing while I am away, and post as soon as I get back. Enjoy the rest of your summer. :)
> 
> ~KCJ


	19. Ch 19 - Heartbreak

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, I am so so sorry that it has taken me forever to post this next chapter. I know back in July I had mentioned that I would get the next chapter up as soon as I got back from vacation. But I didn't end up writing anything while on vacation. And when I got back, things became super crazy, with work, personal life and volunteering with 2 different organizations. And then I went away again in October.  
> So again, very sorry for the wait, and thank you for the messages inquiring if things were ok - beyond ok! And thanks for your concern!  
> Hope you enjoy!

**Ch 19 – Heartbreak**

Killian worried about Emma all night. She had sounded very upset when she had initially called him and though she insisted that everything was ok, he knew it wasn’t. So when Killian woke up the next morning he sent Emma a quick text.

**_I just want to make sure you are ok._ **

**_You can talk to me about anything that is bothering you and I will listen._ **

He didn't receive a response until later that night, and it was a short _I'm good. Thanks, Killian._

But as it turned out, everything wasn't fine and Emma definitely wasn't good, because a few days later Ruby messaged Killian.

_Neal broke up with Emma last night. She spent the entire day at home with me today crying._

_She asked him last night why he's been so distant and never around for a call, and he told her that he met another girl. And since he doesn't believe in cheating on someone, he wanted to end things with Emma so that he could find out if there was anything between this other girl and him._

_I can't believe him!!! I really want to kill him right now Killian! How the hell could he hurt my girl like this???!!!_

Killian couldn’t believe what he was reading. Neal met someone else? Did he think that he would have what he did with Emma with another girl? Emma was the most wonderful girl in the world! Neal was so stupid to let her go! And Emma, she must be completely heart broken. Neal was/is her first love. And he left her. Just like that.

Though he knew she wouldn't want to talk right now, Killian pulled out his phone.

**_Ruby told me what happened and I'm really sorry. If you want to talk, you can call me. I am here for you any time. And if you want me to go down to Florida and kick his ass for hurting you, I will do that as well._ **

Killian wasn't expecting a response back from her, but an hour after sending the message his phone beeped.

_Thanks Killian, I just want to be alone right now._

**_Take the time that you need, Rugrat. I'm here when you're ready._ **

Killian knew that Emma would be struggling right now, and the fact that she still had a few tests coming up in the next few weeks, she would really need to keep her mind focused on school. But it would be hard. Killian hated the fact that he wasn't in Boston, able to support Emma, but he knew Ruby would do her best to get Emma through this tough time. And when she was ready, and needed a distraction, Killian would be there for her.

Over the next week, Killian didn't hear one word from Emma, but he sent her a quick message every so often, just to say 'hi'. Ruby did her best to keep him updated, and often would let him know that Emma had had a rough day because something reminded her of Neal and she would break down. But Ruby also told him not to worry, her family was doing everything to support her and keep her occupied, especially Mary Margaret, who got her to come play with James every day she came home from class. Ruby insisted that was helping a lot, because it was something that never reminded Emma of Neal, since he never played with James.

A week before Thanksgiving, Killian was spent from an extremely tiring day. There was only a little over a month left of training and things were getting tougher. He didn't have the energy to do much and so was in bed and asleep by 10 pm. He was startled awake by his phone ringing.

"Mmphh" he slurred out in his sleep.

"Killian? Oh shit, sorry. Ok go back to bed."

"No. No. Wait." Killian rubbed his eyes and took a sip of water from the glass beside his bed. "Ok. I'm good Emma. How are you doing?"

"Killian I'm really stressed about my test tomorrow. I feel like I don't know anything. Everything that I've been reviewing this week, I just can't remember any of it. Oh god, what am I going to do?" Emma was starting to get a bit hysterical, so Killian did his best to calm her down.

"Ok Rugrat, take a couple of deep breaths. We will get through this." he waited for the sound of her breaths to calm down before he continued talking.

"Ok. First of all, what class is it for?"

Killian hoped that it was a subject he was at least slightly familiar with, and when Emma responded with algebra, he took a sigh of relief. Math was one of his best subjects, but he knew that it was Emma's worst.

Killian stayed up with Emma until about 3 am, making sure she was well versed in all of the concepts that would be covered in the test. She knew most of it, when it came down to it, but because she was emotionally stressed over the past week, her brain wasn't focusing properly.

"Ok Killian, I think I'm ready now. You've stayed up really late to help me. You're gonna be in such bad shape tomorrow. I'm so sorry."

"Emma, there is no need to apologize. You know I'd help you with anything. Making sure you were ready is much more important than sleep. But speaking of which, you should get some sleep as well. What time is your test at?"

"Not till 11."

"Ok, that's good. No more looking at your notes. Go to sleep, wake up at 9 and make sure you eat a big breakfast. No thinking about the test or anything else, ok."

"Ok Killian. Thanks again!"

"You're welcome Rugrat! Good luck tomorrow, you'll do fine!"

"Goodnight. And thanks again for all your help.”

“It’s not a problem. Talk soon ok. And I’ll see you next weekend.”

“Night, Killian.” With that, Emma hung up the phone. Killian turned off his light and hoped that he would be able to fall asleep for at least a couple of hours.

* * *

Killian had an exhausting day; he woke up extremely groggy and with sore muscles. But he tried to make do, and eventually pulled through, falling onto his bed with sheer exhaustion at the end of it. He checked his cell, and sent a quick text to Emma asking how her test went and letting her know he was going to bed, when he didn’t see any message from her.

The next week passed fairly quickly, he and Emma messaging each other about random things, in which he managed to learn small bits and pieces about things she liked or disliked. Pretty soon it was the day before Thanksgiving, and Killian was on a flight back to Boston.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am also posting chapter 20 in the next 5 minutes as well.  
> Thanks for sticking with me and being so patient!  
> ~KCJ


	20. Thanksgiving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your other chapter for the day!

**Ch 20 – Thanksgiving**

Thanksgiving Day at the Jones’ residence was always a big event, but this year, things would be on an even more grand scale. It was decided that the Jones, Blanchard and Nolan families would celebrate the holiday together, a total of about 14 people, including a toddler.  The Jones’ were in charge of the turkey, the gravy, the garlic mashed potatoes and the caramelized shallot soup; the Nolan’s in charge of the apple and pumpkin pies, the roasted butternut squash salad, and the green beans with walnuts. Finally, the Blanchard’s were in charge of the stuffing, the maple glazed sweet potatoes and the cheese garlic biscuits.

Everyone was busy in the kitchen at the Jones’ residence, including Killian and Ruby, who could not stop chattering about Emma and school. She was really excited to have a big Thanksgiving feast and set about decorating the large 12-person dining table. Liam had been in charge of cleaning the house, and once done, he also joined in the kitchen work. Dinner was set for 5, and right before the doorbell rang, Ruby ran around lighting all of the candles, enveloping the house in a warm glow and pumpkin spice scent. There were hugs and greetings all around, especially to Killian, since it had been months since everyone had seen him.

When David, Mary Margaret and James arrived, James launched himself into Killian’s arms.

“Unkie Killi! You back! I miss you!”

“Oh I missed you too buddy. You’ve gotten much bigger since I saw you last. Have you been a good boy?”

“The bestest Unkie!”

“Come on buddy, let’s go see what’s going on in the kitchen ok.” Killian ushered everyone into the house, taking Mary Margaret to the kitchen. Not even five minutes later, the doorbell rang again, Killian going to answer it. On the other side stood Emma, Graham and their parents. He greeted the Nolan’s with quick hellos and hugs, telling them to head on in, but he stopped Emma in the hallway, engulfing her into a tight embrace.

“Hi Rugrat! How are you doing?”

“I’m good Killian. It’s great seeing you. I wanted to thank you in person, for helping me last week with my test. I got the results yesterday.”

“And….” Emma’s face erupted in a wide grin, eyes glinting in excitement.

“And I got an A-. Can you believe it??!! Killian I did so well on the test, I don’t think I’ve ever done that well on anything Math related before.”

It was wonderful to see Emma so happy and proud about something. Killian pulled her in for another hug and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “I knew you could do it. I had all the faith in you.”

Emma gently pulled away from him, and gave him a shy smile. “What made you so sure Killian?”

“I’ve yet to see you fail Emma.” His gaze was intense, and Emma glanced away, cheeks turning pink.

“Well, I couldn’t have done it if it wasn’t for you. You stayed up practically all night helping me.”

“Emma… I didn’t teach you anything. I just reviewed concepts with you. You already knew everything, but you were stressed at the time and were just having a hard time remembering. It was all you in the end.”

“Killian, Emma, come on!” Ruby burst in, breaking the moment between Killian and Emma, who glanced towards the dining room, realizing that everyone was waiting for them. “Sorry, guys. I didn’t mean to interrupt. We can wait a few minutes.”

“No Ruby, it’s fine. Emma was just telling me how she did on her test last week.”

“What!!! Emma you didn’t tell me.” Ruby grabbed a hold of Emma’s arm and dragged her to the dining room, with Killian following. When Killian entered the dining room, he noticed that everyone was already sitting and quietly talking. The only empty seat was the corner seat next to Liam, who sat at the end of the table, and Ruby to his left. David was across from him, followed by Mary Margaret and Emma. Graham sat on the opposite side of Ruby, and the adults were interspersed at the opposite end, with Mr. Jones at the head of the table. Little James was currently sitting on the floor, playing with some toys.

As soon as Killian sat down, Mr. Jones stood up. “I want to start tonight off by saying welcome to all of you and thank you for making what looks and smells to be a mouth-watering Thanksgiving meal. I hope we have enough room in our stomachs to properly enjoy all of this food.” He laughed a bit at that, before he became serious. He looked around the table, his eyes resting gently on Killian and then Emma. “Our families have known each other for decades, our children have been friends since they were kids, and because of their bonds we have become one big family. Although we are not all blood, we are stronger than that. Some of you came later to us than others,” Mr. Jones looked directly at Emma, giving her a smile which she returned as Mary Margaret squeezed her hand, “but have filled our hearts just as much as those who came to us a quarter of a century ago.” A quick glance straight to Liam. “All of you kids have grown into wonderful adults, which all 6 of us parents are extremely proud of. And we are forever grateful to have been able to raise you and have you in our lives. We hope that you will continue to support each other and be in each other’s lives as long as you can. So to a wonderful family, Happy Thanksgiving!”

“Happy Thanksgiving!” the entire table chorused. Everyone had smiles on their faces. Killian looked over to his parents, who were just in the midst of giving each other a small kiss. Killian smiled to himself, grateful, not for the first or last time, that he had been adopted by such an amazing, caring family. He looked at Emma, who had a dazed but happy look on her face. There were tears in her eyes and Mary Margaret wrapped an arm around her shoulders as Graham leaned across the table, giving Emma’s hand a squeeze.

After a couple of minutes of everyone silently reflecting, Liam stood up. “Well, let’s carve this bird. His words were received with laughter and soon everyone was busy helping themselves to all the food and calling across the table for things that they missed. Liam was busy carving the turkey, so Killian was filling his brother’s plate while he filled his own. Soon enough, the entire table was silent as everyone dug into the food. The only comments for the first 10 minutes were about how good the food was or to ask to pass something over for seconds.

The rest of the evening was just as cozy, with everyone lounging on the sofas after eating too much, and trying to digest enough that they would be able to have pie for dessert. Little James was asleep in Killian’s room. When the parents were all tired out, and had stored the leftovers in containers, they all left the kids to their own device. Board games were pulled out and by 2 am it was a big slumber party, with everyone asleep on the floor or sofas.

When Mr. and Mrs. Jones came downstairs the next morning, they couldn’t help but smile at the scene. Liam was on the floor next to the fireplace, with Graham’s and Ruby’s heads on his leg. Mary Margaret and David were curled on one sofa together, with Emma sprawled out on the other. Her hand was tangled in Killian’s hair, who was leaning up against the sofa with his head rolled back. Mrs. Jones took a picture and then headed into the kitchen to make breakfast, and Mr. Jones went to Killian’s room to check on little James.

When everyone had woken up on Friday to the smell of pancakes and eggs, they decided that they wanted to spend their day shopping. So after going home to change, the 7 young adults and 1 child met again and spent the day at the mall, enjoying all the commotion of Black Friday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading everyone!  
> I hope I can get the next chapter out soon. I am very busy these next 2 weeks, but I will try my best not to delay for so long again.  
> I hope you guys stick with me!  
> ~KCJ


	21. Ch 21 – Final Month of Training

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, finally a new chapter. I know I haven't been updating very often, but I hope you all stick with me. Things have been very hectic and in all honesty, since I got pregnant (I am 6.5 months), I feel like I haven't been very inspired, and am constantly suffering from writer's block. And when I get home from work all I want to do is sleep or read, and not use my brain. :)  
> So I hope you all bear with me in this very slow progress of this story. Thank you!

**Ch 21 – Final Month of Training**

Killian flew back to Chicago on Sunday, having had a very relaxing long weekend with his family and friends. There was only 1 month left in training and then he would finally be done and posted back in Boston, working with his brother once the New Year began. He couldn’t wait, so he worked extra hard, making sure that he was doing his best in every aspect of training, be it the physical or technical.

He was also looking forward to going back home so that he could spend time with Emma in person. Over the last month of month of training, he and Emma had been texting and speaking to each other more frequently. She seemed much happier, and Ruby confirmed that in many messages. Saying how Emma mentioned him at some point or other and that she hardly ever thought of Neal now.

Killian didn’t mind the late night conversations though. He couldn’t get enough of her. And he just couldn’t seem to get enough of learning about her, as an adult versus the 3 year old he left behind. She had grown into an absolutely wonderful woman and although she had been through many hardships, she still found strength and courage to live each day to the fullest. Killian was very proud, but also sad that he didn’t get the chance to experience growing up together with Emma.

One night, as was becoming habit, they were having a now familiar conversation regarding their childhoods. “I wish things had turned out differently Emma. Maybe if we had been adopted together, things would have been much better for you.”

“Well, you can’t really change the past Killian. And there’s no sense wishing that things were different. I spent too long doing that, and it just makes things harder to accept.”

“I know I can’t do anything to change it, but it just hurts me hearing about everything you went through. Maybe I could have prevented you from going through all that pain, if only I had remained in your life. Maybe if I hadn’t been adopted when you were so young, or at all…”

“Killian, just stop!” Emma interrupted him. “I’m really happy that you were adopted into a loving family. You deserved that especially after you lost your parents. You actually had memories of them and were heartbroken from losing them. Why would you want to change the chance at having a good life just because I didn’t get the same chance that you did?”

Deep down, Killian knew she was right, that no matter what he couldn’t change the past and that there was no sense wishing things had been different. But still. “I know that Emma, and I also know that there might have been a chance that neither of our lives would have been better if I wasn’t adopted. And I appreciate the fact daily that I was adopted by the Jones’ and that they are the most amazing people in the world. They really helped me get over the loss of my parents. But I can’t help wishing that you had the same opportunities that I did. That you were able to know love and protection and the joys of sibling rivalry.”

“But I did get it eventually. It might have taken time, but I did find loving parents and a brother and sister who adore me.”

“Yes Mary Margaret and Graham are amazing siblings. It’s just that I always worried about you. I thought of you a lot, but I had no way of getting in touch with you. I can’t help but worry about you still.”

"But you don’t need to worry about me anymore; I have a wonderful family to take care of me.”

“I know you do Emma. But I’ve worried about you every day since the day I left you all those years ago. And these past couple of months, knowing that you were so close and I couldn’t do anything to make you happy for the pain I caused you, was killing me.”

“Look Killian, yes I was really hurt when I found out that you were the person from my past I had looked up to, and that you hid that fact from me for a good 3 years. But I’m past it, I understand and I forgave you. Yes you caused me pain, but you’ve more than made up for it. This semester would have been much harder for me if I didn’t have you to lean on. You helped me through my first breakup and guided me in my studies. How many times have I made you stay up helping me study? I really appreciate it. And I’m just glad that we’re in each other’s lives again.”

“I am too Rugrat. And thank you!”

“What for?”

“For being so understanding and forgiving. I’m glad to have you back in my life as well.”

It was getting late, so soon after hearing Emma yawn a few times, Killian decided to end the conversation. “OK Emma, I think it’s time for bed now.”

“Ok, I’ll see you soon right.”

“Of course. Only 1 more week to go, and then I’ll be back in Boston. Good night Rugrat.”

“Night.”

* * *

When graduation day finally came around, Killian was beyond excited. He would be back in Boston in no time, and again his family was attending his graduation ceremony. He had invited Emma but she had her final exam that day, so, apart from Emma and Graham not joining them, the only difference was that Liam was dressed in his whites and would be a part of this ceremony.

As he was getting ready in his white officer’s uniform, he heard his cell beep. He quickly walked to his table and looked at it.

**_Congratulations Killi!!! I’m so proud of you! Can’t wait to see you in a couple of days!_ **

**Thanks, Rugrat! I can’t wait to see you too. :) Good luck on your exam. No worries, ok?**

With a renewed sense of vigour, Killian finished getting ready and headed out of the room, in order to finish another chapter of his life, and begin a new one, hopefully one that would include his little Rugrat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. Please let me know what you think.  
> And since Killian will be back in Boston in the next chapter (and I am hoping that it will be a very delayed Christmas/New Year's chapter), there should be some actual face-to-face interaction between Emma and Killian.
> 
> ~KCJ


End file.
